Blue Perfection
by TheSuperNinja'sCrabcake
Summary: After being liberated from an abusive relationship when she killed her boyfriend out of self-defense, Isabella Swan finds herself landed in a mental hospital. Two years later, the red eyes that haunt her dreams, burning into her every step, however, bring back a past that she isn't ready to confront and before she knows it she's the most wanted person in the country. Post New Moon.
1. Chapter 1

**Title- **Blue Perfection

**Summary-** After getting out of an abusive relationship after killing her boyfriend out of self-defense, Isabella Swan finds herself landed in a mental hospital. The red eyes that haunt her dreams, burning into her every step, however, bring back a past that she isn't ready to confront and before she knows it she's the most wanted person in the country.

**Pairing-** Peter/Bella

**Beginning A/N: **_*****WARNING**_**- **_**Isabella's uses the f-word ALOT and most other expletives A LOT. So, if you're a "lighter" *cough* pansy *cough* person and will start sobbing when you read her using adult language...Cry away from your computer, hun, it'll kill your keyboard.**_

**Chapter One**

_"I can still feel the footprint embed in my side..."_

It was the last place I wanted to be.

_"I can still feel the burn from where he kicked me down..."_

But I couldn't stop the nightmares that were ripping into me, tearing screams that I wanted to hold in from my throat. Adrenaline was a constant presence in my veins, preparing me for the moment that they said that he wasn't truly gone, preparing myself to run. But where was there to run other than into her arms?

_"Dug his nails into my skin..."_

It was torture. The pain. The decisions. The fear. The numbness. It was all too encompassing, smothering.

_"Brandished a knife, while I screamed, cowered in fear." My eyes found _hers_, blank as I cut off the false emotion that had choked my voice before. "Is that what you want to hear, Victoria?"_

But this place was supposed to help me. Or so my "best friend" Dr. Emma told me. Even now, she looked at me with pity resting deep within her blue eyes. She didn't even bother to hide it. Did she think that I couldn't see it? That emotion was sickening; it made me want to launch across this table and rake my nails down the pretty flesh of her face. How could she have pity for something that she never felt?

My eyes stayed where they were, cast down low in a perpetual gaze on the white of the plastic table. I was staring so hard that I could make out the numerous dark flecks that colored the pale plastic. A group of three hundred was in a dark cluster and my vision was blurring as I tried desperately to count the others around them, my mouth moving in a silent blur as I counted the words, ignoring whatever Dr. Emma was saying. My head bobbed and dipped slightly as I counted, my body rocking back and forth lightly on its own accord. My fingers, despite the thick fabric, dug into the flesh of my knees-which was clad in the hideously pink uniform that was reserved for the "crazies"-as I hugged them closer to my chest, finding it difficult to do so due to the limited space on the seat of the plastic chair. Everything was plastic here. "Three hundred twenty."

"Bella?" It irritated me how familiar she was already acting towards me. She hadn't asked if it was okay if she called me Bella. She had just presumed that it would be alright.

"Three hundred twenty-one."

"Bella, are you listening?"

Her voice was so fucking annoying. Always prodding, trying to find some deeper meaning to my actions when there simply wasn't one. "Three hundred twenty-two."

"Are you having difficulty breathing?"

Blatant irritation tinged my face. Obviously if I was fucking counting, then I wasn't having trouble breathing. For good measure though, I muttered the next number louder, making sure to clearly enunciate the words, "Three hundred twenty-three."

The warmth of her hand found its way to my arm, jerking slightly when she felt how cool my body temperature was. Regaining her senses, having remembered about the medical condition with my body heat, she began to speak in what was supposed to be a soothing voice. However, to me, it made nails scraping themselves down a chalkboard sound heavenly. She was that fucking agitating. "Bella, I want you to calm down. You're having a panic attack."

I was so thrown off by the idiotic claim that my counting stuttered to a stop. My eyes flicked from the table to hers so fast that she moved her concerned face out of my space, startled. "Am I?" The question was practically dripping with the disdain I felt for the overly purple woman. Her figure was drenched in a purple pants-suit with lavish, flashy golden jewelry that hung around her neck, sparkled on her fingers, and was snaked around her arms. Honestly, St. John's _had_ to be on a budget cut or something. The woman had no idea what she was talking about, and was overall disturbing. Wouldn't the bangles be irritating to certain patients? And all that jewelry was just an all you can eat buffet to the starved kleptomaniac that resided in room 133B.

"Ecoute, Dr. Emma. Je te deteste. You sicken me," I hissed, the French naturally weaving itself into my voice, on accord of Denis' natural language. There were certain things that came out of my experience with him that turned out to be helpful.

"Do I _honestly_ look like I'm having trouble breathing?" Surprise colored her gaze at the level of my anger as I leaned forward, my voice aiming to bite. My hand grasped my cheek. "Am I flushed? Am I muttering nonsense?" Before she could open her mouth I released my knees from my grasp and slid to my feet. "No. I'm fucking counting goddamn specks on the motherfucking table because your voice is so fucking aggravating that it makes me want to kill myself!"

The area around us quieted instantly as all the nurses stopped their frantic scribbling and typing, some dropping what they were holding, and the security guards spared nervous glances over at our 'secluded' therapy table. It was rare when they actually had to do their job, and when they did it involved giving someone the "booty juice" as Mikayla, my eccentric fourteen year old roommate, so eloquently put it. The other patients, sitting around the snack machine in a suspicious crowd that obviously boasted a trading of drugs-not that any of the staff here was smart enough to notice that-all watched with wide eyes at my display. Across the room, closer to the hallway, Derrick, a self-harm patient, and Adam, previously mentioned kleptomaniac, sent me mad, encouraging grins.

Adam's green eyes sparkled as a devilish smile curled up his lips, the happy expression directed towards me before they locked on Dr. Emma's glittering necklace. His fingers twitched, and I instantly turned my attention back to Mrs.-I-Have-No-Clue-What-The-Fuck-I'm-Talking-About so that I couldn't be called out as a witness to Adam's theft.

Her face was frozen for a few seconds before her delicate fingers slowly slid down to the session recorder that clipped to her blouse under the guise of a supposedly inconspicuous broach. Bitch needed to get her money back. Her cherry blossom, bright pink lips parted as she attempted to whisper-and failed considering the fact that her voice was so fuck-annoying-into the shimmering gold, "Make note that patient Swan, Isabella is a suicide risk."

What. The. Fuck.

Adam's eyes flicked to mine, dissuasion thick in his gaze, but it was lost on me.

"Now, Bella," she said calmly as she released the recorder, folding her hands back neatly in her lap, unaware of the fifty different fucking ways that I was planning to kill her. My body shuddered as anger seeped into my face, replacing my usual sarcastic disposition. My nails stung as they sliced into the flesh of my palm, my fists shuddering I was clenching them so hard. "There is no reason for you to hurt yourself here. We are just trying to help you. Besides, I'm your friend."

"You fucking cun-" A sound of pure anger cut off my voice, clawing free from my throat as I lunged towards her, all purpose intent on maiming and disfiguring. My hands found her perfectly blonde hair, fingers weaving themselves in them tightly as I dragged her head down and slammed it onto the table, hopefully hard enough to hurt the bitch. The scream that ran from her failed to drown out the calling of the two scrawny security details for backup into their walkie-talkies.

"You think I'm fucking insane? You think sitting me in a room with just plastic will protect you? I'll fucking kill you; choke you with your own damn intestines bitch. If you don't fucking quit spouting such bullshit diagnoses I'll find a way to shove my hand so far up your ass that I'll still be able to do my fucking nails," I growled, relishing in the excessive mascara that practically colored her face with her tears as she helplessly screeched for the guards to help her.

It was fuck-annoying. _She _was fuck-annoying. This _place _was fucking annoying. Everything was just so fucking grating. I hated it here. Everyone acted like they knew what they were talking about, but they didn't. The hospital was underfunded, the doctors were perverts, eating everything with spoons was steadily pissing me off, and I, honestly, was seriously about to call in a bomb threat just so that we could all be evacuated and I could make my escape from these fucking idiotic people.

Adam, the avid Y.O.L.O. supporter, quickly ran up, scooping up the broach that had fallen when I grabbed the doctor, crooning to it softly before his eyes met mine and he cast me a flirtatious wink. Backing up warily once he saw the approaching security guards, he retreated, disappearing down the hallway to go hide it in his room in a place that no one would probably ever find.

"You ruined my face!" A line of blood trickled down the purple woman's forehead from a thin cut that the table had inflicted, and I frowned at the minimal damage that the plastic had cause.

Not perturbed by the now sprinting security, I made to spit in her face as a perfect last 'fuck you' but before the saliva was able to be launched I was tackled by what felt like a wall, which meant that Bernerd, the largest security guard, had finally reached us. The bastard practically squished my lithe form, pinning my struggling arms as I tried to latch onto Dr. Emma's ankle to drag the bitch down with me. As I fell through, my reaching hand seemed to elongate and everything lengthened through my sudden tunnel vision. Trying desperately to keep my eyes open, I managed to catch a glimpse of Jacob-ironically that was the name of the outrageously spray tanned elderly owner that reminded of me of Jacob Black, whom of which was the very person who had me committed. From what I could make out the opulent blond was comforting the other blonde asinine that supposedly held a psychology degree, saying calming things to her that were lost on my ears as I drifted beyond the end of consciousness.

*...*...*...*...*

_"Is this what you wanted?" My eyes studied hers, watching her movements warily even though I knew that she could move so quickly that she could crush my esophagus before I had a chance to even scream. The false bravery that flowed through my veins fueled the words that burst from my shaking form as I advanced the volatile vampire. "To be eternally wandering, revenge the only thing on your mind? Are you pacified now? He's dead! Denis is dead and it's your goddamn fault!" Emotion choked up my voice as I tried to keep my gaze from landing on the body, drenched in thick decadence. _

_Catlike eyes flickered maliciously, soaked fiery curls still flailed wildly around her shoulders, face twisted into a heinously taunting grin. "Oh but, darling Isabella, it was all you." Her voice, while dripping with sugar and halos, had an ever present dangerous octave to it that had shivers running up my spine, tingling across my skin. Her ruby eyes glimmered with excitement and her grin stretched as she stepped closer, so close that I could feel the chill that her body gave off. "_You're_ the one who slit his throat, human. Not me." Examining her dirt bitten nails, she continued on as if she hadn't stolen the breath from my throat already. "Self defense, you call it? Tsk tsk."_

_"H-he was going to kill me..." I choked out past the tears that were clouding in my throat and eyes, feeding the lump that seemed to prevent speech. Scarlet slipped past my paling lips, trailing down my chin as the copper bubbled in my mouth, overflowing. I pressed my hand tightly to the wound that I could barely feel anymore on my stomach in a vain attempt to stop the bleeding. Denis' small knife was still embed in my flesh, the larger one abandoned by his stationary person. _

_A feral hiss broke through Victoria's lips, her eyes turning into narrowed slits. As she stepped forward, her hips swaying in a stalking manner, I took scrambled steps backward in response, eliciting a grin from her. Her nostrils flared slightly as she finally took in the scent of my blood saturating the air. Eyes a flat black, she cocked her head to the side as she enunciated my name excruciatingly slow. "Is-a-bel-la." _

_Red eyes vastly different from Victoria's and darkening by the moment flooded my subconscious, disrupting the memory that chose to haunt my dreams. As the images blurred, returning to a safer place in my mind, a deep voice was the last thing that I heard. A loud, insistent, "Wake up."_

Inappropriate words were on the forefront of my mind as I groggily woke up, pain surging through my body as my eyes fluttered open only to be assaulted by the light that streamed in from the open blinds. "Fuck…" I groaned miserably. "W-What happened?"

Jumping into view was Mikayla, her raven colored pigtails splaying around her as she raised her hands in front of her well gifted chest and began to shake her ass like we were in a club-which she wouldn't have been allowed in anyways. "They stuck you with the booty bo-booty bo-booty-bo-booty-bo-booty bo-booty booty bo-booty bo-booty bo-booty bo-booty-" Her singing instantly quieted as I gave her an uninterested but pointed stare. Clearing her throat, the fourteen year old scratched her arm apologetically. "They stuck you in the ass," she said plainly, her brown eyes sparkling at me as they watched me with keen interest.

Groaning, I attempted to sit up, wincing as I felt my muscles ache in protest due to their fatigue and Bernerd. Running a hand through my hair messily, I peeked out at her from beneath the brunette strands. "Don't use expletives. You're too young," was my oh-so intelligently hypocritical response. The remnants of the drug trudged through my system, making my body protest the stretch that I let loose, curling my toes in that long lasting exertion of relief.

"Beeeellllaaaaa," Mikayla drew out in a whine as she hopped onto my bed, making me huff as her weight landed on my stomach. Her storm cloud eyes burned into mine, teeming with questions that I honestly felt too fucking exhausted to answer.

Throwing an arm over my eyes tiredly, I cast a glance at her from beneath it, taking a deep breath to cool the unprovoked irritation in my voice. "What?"

Pressing her lips so tightly together so that it was pursed in her fishie-pout, the fourteen year old jutted out her bottom lip, her pigtails brushing against the apples of her cheeks. Eyes bright, she leaned forward so that she was more in my space. A Cheshire cat grin stretched itself across her tiny face, her expression bubbling with mischief. "Guess what happened?"

"You finally grew up?" I deadpanned, feeling the grogginess slowly dissipate from my aching limbs. The bed sheet was scratchy as hell, and I was already feeling a breeze which meant that I was wearing a hospital gown once again, instead of the pink top and pants that we were allowed.

She scowled at me, blowing me a quick raspberry before she continued. "Noooo. They fired Dr. Emma!"

Unable to stop it, a wide grin took over my face, and I knew that my eyes were twinkling with satisfaction. Was she fucking serious? I was oozing happiness from every pore.

A smirk lifted her expression as she rocked backwards in her excitement, causing me to hiss a warning to her as her boney butt bit into my sensitive stomach. Instantly ceasing her movement, the grin still in place, she blurted, "The word is that they did some digging and found out that her degree and diploma were forged! She's not even a psychologist! And that's not even the best part!" I honestly didn't see how it could get any better; my stomach hurt I was laughing so hard by this point. It had been so fucking obvious, and I'd only known her two years. "She was arrested! Mr. Davenport called the coppers on her. It was so fuc-freaking hilarious! She tried to run and they had to tase her! I peed myself I laughed so hard."

My laughter siphoned off into a violent coughing fit due to the restricting pressure on my stomach, and I finally had to push her off of me. The overly large pink fluff, that they must've given her to replace her urine soaked clothes, swallowed her petite form as she rolled of the bed with a yelp.

Instantaneously, she popped right back up, her hair mused and eyes shiny with happiness as she promptly announced, "I heard what Mr. Davenport said! He said that means that they have to bring in another therapist person and they'll have to reevaluate _everyone's_ cases. We can go free, Bella! I can see my mom and you can see your dad. Everythi-" Her voice choked off as it slowly blanched, tears beginning to fall down her usually happy colored cheeks. "Everything…" She buried her face in the sickly pale green comforter in an attempt to stifle her tears. A whisper escaped her, muffled, but I still heard it. "can go back to normal. Maybe they'll love us again now that we're not crazy anymore."

Leaning over the side of the bed, my eyes softening, I grasped her hand, smoothing my thumb over the delicate skin. "Of course your mother loves you, Mikayla." I struggled to push down my writhing emotions at my own mother's blatant rejection of me, attempting to bury it beneath the wall. "She never stopped loving you."

Sniffling heavily, she lifted her head, guiding her reddened eyes to my face. I watched as they finally came into focus as she began to listen to what I was saying. "Then why doesn't she visit? Why doesn't she send me letters or e-mails? I haven't heard from her in almost a year." Before I could say anything that could possible rectify what she was saying, she bluntly cut me off before I even began. "Don't say it, Bella. I'm not little anymore. You can be honest. I know that she hates me. She hates having a crazy, _stupid_ girl for a daughter. She's ashamed."

"Shut up, Mikayla," I whispered softly, making her eyes, which had lowered in her sudden sadness, snap right back to mine. "You're not crazy. You're not stupid. And if she is ashamed of someone as amazing and as loving as you then _she's_ the one who's crazy." Grasping her chin lightly, I stated calmly, "Fuck her." At her widened eyes, I smiled encouragingly. "That, _and that only_," I added quickly. "can you say."

The normally bubbly girl wet her lips, tasting the salt there before she whispered in a dry voice, "Fuck her…"

I raised an eyebrow at her sudden meekness, releasing her hand so that I could bump her shoulder with mine. "Are you serious? Miss Mikayla-Motor-Mouth can't do better than that?" A smidgen of desperation colored my face as I tried to goad a better response from her. She was fragile, and even though I knew she would never get that depressed, I didn't want her to slip into the all-consuming black hole that I had been plagued with when I first came here. I didn't want her to hate herself when she finally realized that her parents didn't care just like mine hadn't. And it seemed like that moment had finally arrived.

"Fuck her!" A tentative smile.

"Louder," I cooed, leaning forward and tickling her ribcage without mercy, finding the sensitive spots with ease.

Shrieking through her giggles and trying to swat at me, "_Fuck her_!" her smile blinded me.

"SHUT UP YOU BLOODY WANKERS; SOME PEOPLE ARE TRYING LISTEN TO THE FAIRY GODDESS' WISDOM BEFORE SHE KILLS US ALL!" The sudden scream made us both jump, silence falling over us. "SO SHUT THE HELL UP!"

The only sound was the creaking of the bed as we stilled, looking at each other slowly. Casting a grin at our doorway I shouted, "Ernest or Phillip, tell Ms. Goddess I said hi!"

"Will do, Bella!" Phillip replied with abrupt contentment from his room across the hall, making Mikayla have to shove her hand over her mouth to stifle her bursting laughter. It something that we did often over the past year: fuck with the actual loonies.

Ernest/Phillip was a man somewhere into his thirties who was afflicted with Dissociative Identity Disorder. In other words, spilt personality was prominent in his mannerisms, as well as delusions. Ernest was always ranting and raving about some fucking fairy, while Phillip was always laid-back and shared his banana pudding at lunch time. It honestly made me ponder whether there could actually be fairies considering the fact that vampires were real, but I doubted.

"Fuck her," Mikayla said, nodding to herself before she slipped into a standing position, rising up on her tip-toes as she raised her arms a stretched, exhaling a long relieved sigh. "I'm going to go to bed." A sly grin was directed in my direction. "With you getting the booty juice again, and Dr. Emma getting fired, I'm worn out." "G'night, Bella," was her yawn as she retreated to the far side of the room, nearest to tiny suicide-preventing window, and promptly plopped herself onto her bed.

Shifting myself, I finally took notice of the throbbing in my ass and glared at the ceiling briefly, thinking up other ways to kill the bitch of a fake doctor. Calming myself with the fact that her high-end, prissy self was stuck in a rotting jail cell full of potentially volatile gangs looking for fresh meat, I settled under the covers, trying to ignore how uncomfortable wearing clothing while sleeping was. A thing that "Dr." Emma had said was that I my hatred for wearing clothes while sleeping—which she had managed to wheedle out of me when I was on the happy pills before they cut me off—was unhealthy and a symptom of dreingkslysoiosis—which obviously we all now know doesn't even fucking _exist. _I clenched my fists, catching some of the comforter in my grasp. Had the hospital personnel not heard of Google? We could've solved this shit, sent everyone home who was actually sane, and kicked the bitch out sooner.

It was her fault that I was still stuck in this detestable place two years later. My breathing picked up as my anger did, starting to become erratic.

But... Jacob. It was his entire fault. If he hadn't committed me none of this would've happened.

No…It was Edward's. Him and his fucking family. If they hadn't brought me into their world and spit me out then I never would have been depressed enough to let Denis beat. Wouldn't have been depressed enough to let him spill the precious blood that Edward coveted so much just to spite his memory.

The blame game that had taken root in my mind slowly came to a cease.

"I'm just a bitter bitch," I whispered to nothing, as I closed my eyes as I ran a hand through my hair to calm myself, actually recognizing the fact that I was about to have an _actual_ panic attack. "…with no one else to blame but myself." Not even Victoria.

Opening my eyes what felt like minutes later, I slackened my death grip on the bed.

_Mikayla forgot that creepy ass bear,_ I noted as my eyes caught site of the blue ball of buff siting on the end table, looking like a cutesy cub on steroids. Was that seriously what the toy companies thought kids found comforting? Their production team _had_ to be on something, maybe a little puff-puff.

Dragging myself out of bed, I began to walk only to stub my toe on the end of the bed. Muttering a curse under my breath, my pace quickened to avoid hitting anything else.

"You forgot this, kiddo," I whispered, tucking it under her loosely wrapped arm, giving her a warm kiss on her forehead like I remembered my father doing to me when I was younger.

"I love you, Mom," she mumbled, blinking those gray eyes at me wearily before giving a soft content sigh as she gently drifted off into the realm of unconsciousness, leaving me staring at her blankly for a minute until I finally reined in my internal emotions.

"Can't fucking deal with kids and all this emotional shit," I mumbled as I flicked off the light and walked back over to my bed, trying to ignore the stinging in my ass that throbbed with every step that I took.

Fucking shots. I hated sedatives with a _passion_. Every single time that I get stuck with that damn needle—which hadn't been happening recently actually considering that I was warned to be good or they would switch to restraints—it always hurt like a bitch afterwards.

Climbing back into the itchy bed, I leaned back against the metal headboard, trying to tune out the muttering of Ernest across the hall, which was quickly escalating in volume. It wasn't long until there was the scuffle of a nurse padding into his room, commanding him to be quiet, and then leaving, silence following his or her departure. It was with that silence that I drifted.

Naturally, though James' venom had been sucked out of my wrist, it had affected me. My body temperature, though not as low as that of the vampires, was still oddly low for a human. As a result, I unconsciously sought out heat no matter the situation. Half dazed and still half asleep I felt heat radiating faintly near me. Unknowingly, I snuggled closer towards the incalescence. Pressing my freezing fingertips to the source, warmth exploded through them as I met bare skin. Subconsciously, I recognized the calefaction.

"A-Adam?" Sleep was thick in my voice as my eyes fluttered open, landing on the kleptomaniac who had his arm curled around my body.

This had become a regular occurrence since my first year when he had helped me through one of my legit panic attacks; it was moments later that colored us fast friends.

On the subject of him invading my bed space though, it didn't matter where I was. Somehow Adam managed to always sneak out of his room and into mine, where he would promptly become a snuggle bug. And being the avid kleptomaniac that he was, usually I would wake up missing random articles of clothing. This time, my right sock was nowhere to be found. Staring blankly at my toes, I wiggled them out of boredom. Sighing, my attention span broken, I tossed a glance at Adam only to see his peacefully sleeping face.

Freeing an arm I brushed a black strand out of his eyes, watching his response of opening them languidly to reveal an emerald green. "Hey…" he sighed, his hand moving from my body to caress my cheek.

"Where's my sock?"

A smirk tilted his lips upwards giving him away despite the sudden innocent face he gained. "No idea; though I could have an idea of where your bra could go," he added, waggling his eyebrows.

Glaring at him in a warning, I cast a glance over a Mikayla. She mumbled nonsense before turning on her side, her steroids-bear trapped in her tight grip as her light snores picked back up.

"Don't wake the fucking kid with your idiocy," I hissed under my breath, making sure to make my voice light so he would know that I was playing.

A dark eyebrow raised, he pulled me closer to him so that our bodies fit together, whispering, "I'll be quiet, Bella…" My heart thudded as he planted light kisses down the side of my jaw, his fingers stroking my arm, urging me to relax.

"Adam," I muttered uneasily as the heat of his mouth touched my skin of my neck and he began to rake his teeth over it. Though we were close, he hadn't truly shown any signs of returning the attraction that I joked—deadpanned as well—about having for him.

Heat flushed through my body as he rolled on top of me, his leg wedged in between my thighs. Pants escaped my lips and my back arched as he sucked on a particular sensitive part. "Fuck…Adam," I gasped as his moved his leg against my heated core. My fingers weaved themselves in his hair and I yanked to pull him back up to look at me. His eyes met mine, molten green, and he dipped his lips down to mine, molding ours together with a fervor that instantly caused heat to pool between my legs, eliciting a soft moan.

My hips bucked against his leg, seeking that much needed friction as our tongues battled for dominance. His arousal hardened through his pants, pressing against my hip. A hand trailed itself up my stomach, causing me to shiver, until it found my nipple straining against the thin fabric. Lips pulling from mine, other hand pulling down the neckline, his teeth found their way to the pebbled pink, scraping along it before he took it in his mouth. His tongue swirled around it and he began moving his leg against my core, freeing moans that I wanted to keep quiet. My hand instantly slipped down, pressing against his clothed length, beginning to palm it.

"Do you know how much I love you?"

The sudden gasp made me pause, the lust flickering between us, and look at him. His eyes were shining, face flushed in his arousal.

In that instant, I felt ashamed of myself. I loved Adam, yes, but I hadn't even begun to think about him in any way other than in a friendship or sexually (I had wet dreams that were awkward as fuck to have while he was lying next to me).

Fuck, I felt ashamed that I was practically dry fucking someone in the same room as the sleeping kid that just called me her mother not too long ago.

He shifted his body weight so that he wouldn't be crushing me, freeing the scent of our ardor into the air. "Adam..."

A low malevolent sound rumbled through the air, just barely teasing along the boundary of my hearing. However, hanging around with vampires and werewolves had sharpened my hearing enough that I could recognize a low-pitched growl when I heard one.

My breath catching in my throat, my eyes flickered to the window quick enough to catch a glimpse of the male before he disappeared. The faint recollection of his eyes burned into me, making the back of my neck tingle with fear.

"Red…"

**Ending A/N: *Crickets* So yeah…this is what I suddenly came up with out of nowhere while staring at my computer, willing Chapter 10 of Blackout to type. I literally have no inspiration for that story and I apologize. I had to separate story lines and can't figure out how to make them mesh **_**together**_**. Anyhow, please give me feedback on whether this is worth trying or not. I love reviews so please let me read them :)**

**Btw, anyone catch me making fun of Yolo? lmao. Please stop overusing that phrase, teenagers of the world. Sincerely, another teenager. *Glare***

**~Eryn "Ninja" Silvenia**


	2. Chapter 2

**Title- **Blue Perfection

**Author: **Eryn "Ninja" Silvenia

**Summary-** After getting out of an abusive relationship after killing her boyfriend out of self-defense, Isabella Swan finds herself landed in a mental hospital. The red eyes that haunt her dreams, burning into her every step, however, bring back a past that she isn't ready to confront and before she knows it she's the most wanted person in the country.

**Pairing-** Peter/Bella

**Disclaimer-****I will never own Twilight, nor do I wish to own such a story where vampires resemble fairies. Stephanie Meyer, I do, however, commend you for managing to sucker a naïve, romantically starved demographic into buying your series. Congratu-fucking-lations.****If it wasn't for you, we also wouldn't have Twilight fanfiction—which kicks ass!—so I guess we do owe you a lot. So here it is: I, Eryn Silvenia, a loyal Mary-Sue hater, am saying thank you just this once. Thank you, S.M. **

**Beginning A/N:**** I'm flabbergasted at the amount of reviews I got for just one chapter. I'm completely elated and am profusely apologizing for not updating earlier, but I was working out kinks in the plot and where I wanted it to go now that I have chosen to pursue it—thanks to such strong approval from all of you wonderful reviewers and readers~ As a thank you, I decided to make this chapter longer than originally planned. THANK YOU EVERYONE! Now that my thanks are over…**

**So…Is anyone else in loooooove with fanfiction's new layout? I have found myself grinning maniacally at it every time I read a story, because sometimes I'll forget the summary and the author doesn't put it every chapter. Well, it's gained a happy supporter.**

**However, I want to shake and rattle everyone's fucking teeth for this bullshit that they are spewing against explicit material on fanfiction. Deleting accounts without warning is so immature and they should at least give an author the chance to fix it. As authors we live and breathe reviews, and to wake up and suddenly see that they are all gone in the morning is heartbreaking. Personally, if this story gets taken down—because it WILL have graphic violence as well as sex—then I'm moving to like most are. I will completely be disappearing from fanfiction if even one is deleted. That said, I'd like to say something else: **

**As for my update pattern, I usually try to get one out every week. The maximum wait time would be updating every other week, if I take longer than that then automatically assume this story is on a temporary hiatus (Those who read Blackout, if you haven't caught on yet, I'm sorry but it's on a hiatus until my inspiration returns.) My life is in a rough patch right now with family problems, deaths, and my fiancé having moved to Italy so even though I love writing, there's no way that it can be my first priority right now. Sorry. **

**Important Story Note:**** I thought that I should go ahead and clear this up before anyone brought it to my attention. Bella is nineteen. When she said that she had been in the hospital for two years she was exaggerating, it was more like a year and a half. She was committed five months after her birthday so that makes her nineteen years and seven months. Just going ahead and clearing that up.**

**Warning: This may start off a little boring due to therapy yada. XD Sorry but I can't just skip it.**

**Chapter Two**

The ticking, exuding from the wall, filled the white walled room, its partner the repetitive tapping of a pen against the stark white sheet of paper. Pure brown hair brushed against my cheeks as the bright light invaded my view as one of the nurses shined a flashlight in my eyes. She had been poking and prodding at me ever since I had been sat down in the chair.

Pulling back, dry strands falling free from her messy bun, she cast her blue eyes at the man. "Pupils are dilating normally." Her fingers swiftly found my wrist, jerking back softly at the temperature before she dove back in and found a pulse. "Pulse rate is normal," was the soft announcement she gave after a minute of my heart rate thrumming against her fingers.

A lowly murmured thanks was given to the nurse by the man sitting opposite of me before a motion to the security outside had the door opening so that she could leave. Casting a condescending glance at me that obviously meant behave, the older woman held my gaze, looking for some sort of confirmation. Annoyance bubbled in me but I squashed it. It was a lost cause; the moment of opportunity to show her the meaning of a true verbal lashing had passed now that I realized that it would only prove the hospital's idiotic belief that I was clinically off my rocker.

Nodding curtly, I returned my sights to the man across from me.

Once she had left—much to my happiness—it was silent for a few moments. The only sound being the brief skimming over notes that he was doing and the noise of his pen upon a sheet of paper. Finally, when he deemed himself ready enough or my patience tested enough he began, not even bothering to look up from his papers.

"Name?"

"Isabella Marie Swan. Or is that not on the file?" The sarcasm that I had gained sometime after my first few months here seemed to be a constant companion, especially in situations where it was better to do without it. Though right now, it made sense. It was a stupid fucking question to ask.

The soft scratching that he had been instigating ceased at my hissed question, and the brunette man looked at me, dark eyes stony and critical behind the thin frame of his glasses. One look from him and I could already tell that he was one of the serious types who devoted every waking hour to his career. Unfortunately, that meant that lying to sweeten my mental state was out. That was either good or bad for me. "The question, which you answered correctly, contributed to ruling out you being a compulsive liar or having a dual personality, Ms. Swan."

Surprise tinged my features lightly, and I fought to keep the interested smile from my face though I'm sure it showed briefly. "Clever," was all I said before leaning back in my chair, making it creak at my weight. At the noise the security guard standing outside the room glanced through the small window at me, and I shot him a seething, irritated 'Fuck the hell off' glare.

It made absolutely no sense to give patients this semblance of privacy if the fuckers could hear a chair from the other side of the room creak while outside the door. He might as well just waltz in here, grab a cushion, and plop himself down while grabbing some popcorn to further glorify getting an earful of my fucked up life.

The click of the psychologist's pen signaled the next question—the pen having taken a temporary residence on the table.

"Your age?"

Fuck, I could already see this as being boring. "Nineteen," I sighed.

The smell of the room invaded my nostrils. Sickly clean. It smelled vaguely of the floral air fresheners that are bought cheaply at the gas station. The aroma was so thick that it was practically choking, shoving roses and some other sweet smelling shit down my throat. I don't know how the doctor can stand it; I'm about to keel over with every breath.

"Parents?"

"Charlie Swan and Renee Dwyer." Their names rolled off my tongue, dripping with the disdain and animosity that I felt over their abrupt abandonment. They hadn't even bothered to ship me off with so much as a simple "Fuck you" or a "We love you, Bella". They left it to a kid, a fucking _kid_, to drag me here against my will and commit me to the mental ward. A year and a half later still not one letter. Not one visitation. Not one phone call. I'd be lying if I said that it didn't hurt. It hurt like a bitch to know that the last two living relatives that I have hate me to the point where they pretend I don't even exist.

Slightly raising an eyebrow at my hostile tone, he picked up his pen once more. "You dislike your parents?"

Shifting uncomfortably in my chair, my eyes narrowed in my awkwardness. He wasn't "Dr." Bitch, so I wasn't exactly positive how I should react to his intrusive questions. I could kindly tell him to fuck off—a one fingered salute included with said words—or I could play along with his questions like a good little girl and then finally say fuck all of them when I have my bags packed and am on my way out of this place.

My mind set, I stopped leaning back on the chair, returning it back to its four legged position on the pristine white tiled floor. "I'm not going to lie," I told him point blank. "Nor will I sugar coat anything that I'm about to say."

Dr. Evred—I had caught his name from the nurse's incessant ramblings when she had first brought me in here to wait for him, before I had finally told her to shut the hell up—stared at me patiently, though his eyes were expectant of my continuation.

"I fucking _hate_ that bitch."

Renee. So quick to dump me off in this place via Jacob and leave with Phil. That obvious fake promise of, "_It'll be okay, sweetheart; we'll come see you soon"_ was complete and utter bullshit. Even then, a naïve barely eighteen, I could see the blatant lies in her overly mascaraed eyes, and the nervous way that she kept glancing at Phil—the prompting bastard—to receive reassuring, encouraging all-too-practiced smiles.

"Your mother." It wasn't a question, just a statement and I was grateful for that. If he had articulated it any other way, it surely would have set me off on his ass, effectively ruining my chances of proving that I wasn't crazy.

"She should have never had children," I found myself saying, eyes looking up at the ceiling. The cliché white color was maddening. "I quickly learned when I was younger that if I wanted food, running water, and electricity that I had to be the one to ensure that the shopping was done and that the bills were paid." "Hell," I chuckled wryly as my eyes returned to the reflective table. "I was lying about my age to get into jobs by the time I was twelve."

"Do you resent her for that?"

"Not for that." The psychologist glanced up from his writing, obviously wanting me to go on but I was done with the subject. After a minute of a silent, "I'm not going to tell you shit" stare down, he finally sighed under his breath before moving on.

"What about your father?"

Thinking about Charlie never failed to bring a swift pang to my chest and a lump to my throat that made me feel like I was nine. "What is there to say about him?" I questioned, hating the fact that even I could hear that my voice was weak and lacking the fire that it was normally bathed in. "I loved my father, still do, but he abandoned me without a single word. He didn't even stop Jacob when he was dragging me out my house, and practically throwing me in the car, while I banged on the fucking windows to be let out. I still remember his face looking down at me from the outside while Renee was giving Jacob directions to here. It was fucked up." A brief exhale left my lips, as I fought through my thoughts to get back on track to answering his question. "What else can I say? That's always how Charlie's been: on the outside. Then again, it's been almost two years; I doubt I even know the man anymore."

Silence, a seemingly constant inside this room, lingered briefly before Dr. Evred nodded to me—a sure signal that he was going to move on.

Clearing his throat, he unbuttoned his cuffs, a sigh escaping him as he made himself more comfortable. I felt sorry for the guy, to be honest. I was probably his thirtieth patient today to be evaluated and he was nowhere near done. And it wasn't like I was exactly making things easy.

"How are you sleeping?"

Being honest wasn't going to kill me now. Fuck, I was sane, albeit a little fucked up in the head, but still sane. "I still have nightmares about Denis."

"Ah yes, you're deceased boyfriend, am I correct?" Pushing the bridge of his glasses up his nose so that they nestled better and ignoring my attempt at a response, he straightened a few papers before folding slipping a few back into a manila folder and giving me his full attention. "Correct me if I'm wrong, as information can always be recorded incorrectly after all, but you were in an abusive relationship with Mr. Humainefaux for how long?"

My muscles stiffened and I could already feel the reluctance to talk about what happened seeping in my bones. I had never spoke about what happened between Denis and I to anyone, besides Victoria—whom of which had a front fucking seat to it all—and the jury from my trial. "Five months."

"You were found innocent at the trial by ruling of self-defense thanks to the testimony of the witness, correct?"

Again, fingers clenched underneath the table, I bit back my snarl and smoothed my voice out to an unemotional, "Yes."

"Why a knife, Ms. Swan?" he asked, as simply and calmly as if asking me what color shirt I was wearing today—pink, it was always fucking pink around here.

My eyes burned into his. "Why not, Doctor? He was going to fucking kill me. I was half dead already by the time my hand found one and I shoved it outwards to protect myself. I did what I had to to survive and you're seriously fucking asking me _why_ _a fucking knife?_"

He calmly watched my reaction and I somewhere around my heavy breathing I realized that I was giving him exactly what he wanted.

Noting that I had caught on, he said, "Ms. Swan. Were you ever counseled after the death of your boyfriend?"

"No."_ Was it that fucking obvious,_ I thought dryly. "But that, in no way, makes me insane, Dr. Evred," I pointed out.

"That _does_ make you still have the thoughts of a victim," he suddenly answered, eyes watching me—always watching. "which is not healthy. That does not make you insane, I agree, but it does mean that you have not fully dealt with the abuse or the fact that you have killed someone."

Not waiting, once again, for my answer—which was going to be chock full of expletives, which I think he sensed—he swiftly moved on, clicking his pen open.

His questions had no limit.

Do you have trouble falling asleep, staying asleep, waking up?

How is your energy level though the day?

Do you have enough energy to get things done?

How is your appetite?

How do you feel most days?

Are there things that worry you a lot?

Have you ever felt an intense fear or worry that something bad would happen to you?

"I'm in a fucking metal ward, sir. What could possibly be worse," I snapped, irritation showing through my voice.

Ignoring my attitude, he continued on as if he hadn't heard me, though it was obvious that he had by the way he was writing. "Are there specific things that frighten you?" he questioned.

My mind quickly flashed to Victoria but I dispelled the image forming in my head of her eyes burning into me with malicious intent, of that catlike smile promising unfathomable agony. Glancing back up at the psychologist, it was pretty obvious that he had seen my quick drift into window-licker mode so I threw him a bone. "I don't like not knowing about the future. That's one of the reasons I hate being in here. It's confining."

More writing. More sporadic questions.

"Do you ever feel the need to do something over and over until it's perfect?"

"You do realize that we're in a mental hospital, right? That's all they make us do. Each day it's the same flawless routine. If it were my decision then hell no I wouldn't. Here it's a requirement."

"Are there ever thoughts that you are unable to get out of your head?"

"Well, there's the fucking fact that I want to smash my fist in every face here. Besides the fact that I'm sick of these people and want to get out of here, not really."

I was starting to get into the routine of his questions when a random one slipped out of his lips that was just way too fucking ironic.

"Have you ever felt someone was reading you mind or making you think things?"

Fucking Edward. I never told him, but at times I could feel him pushing at me, trying to read my thoughts. It always left me with a fucking headache and a sick sense of being violated.

"_Do you hate the fact that you can't read my mind?" His fingers were ice around my waist, despite my azure sweater, as he grasped it in what was a light grip to him but firm to me. The question arose after a light headache began pounding in my temples, and I knew that he had been trying to again. _

_His nose, for the seventh time that day, skimmed along my neck, savoring my scent. "No, love." His answering exhale of words breathed frigid air across my neck, and I shivered, questions and suspicions suddenly forgotten. _

Naturally, my answer was a vehement, "Hell no" coupled with an incredulous look at the doctor.

After a few more sporadic and seemingly pointless questions about my menstrual cycle, whether or not I heard voices, and a couple questions about the trial I had been in, I had finally reached my fucking limit.

"Have you ever felt your mind was playing tricks on you?" I was not fucking delusional.

"You know that moment when you get too tired? Then," I relayed, making him raise his eyebrows tiredly at my arms crossed form.

"Have you ever held an intense hatred for something that you couldn't explain?"

My eyes held his, completely serious. "Fucking LEGOS. Though that's easily explained. They hurt like a bitch when you step on them. Have you ever tried to get one of those fuckers out of your foot? They're like parasites or some shit." When I had worked at Newton's Outfitters, a shitload of kids thought it was hilarious as hell to leave them in the aisles for Mike and I to step on. Of course, back then I had just pried them out of my feet and smiled politely at their parents while the little brats made faces and spat at us.

Sighing once again and running a hand through his hair, the good doctor dropped his eyes from mine wearily. "I think that's enough, Ms. Swan."

Wondering if I had pushed him too far, I watched him silently for a few seconds before speaking up, "So…are you going to let me know if you've deemed my psyche insane or not?"

"Well, Ms. Swan," Dr. Evred said as he closed his notebook, afterwards moving his fingers downwards to fix his loosened cuff links. "It is my determination that you are, without a doubt, completely sane. A bit bitter and angry," a wry smile tilted his lips. "but sane nonetheless."

I widened my eyes in relief. "Thank fuck you can see that. I almost pummeled that other bitch to death."

"Ah, you're speaking of that con-artist Lydia." He nodded. "I heard about the diagnoses that she had given other patients and was positively appalled. Any intelligent person could tell that they were fake. The personnel here, in my opinion, should have their degrees revoked for not noticing sooner."

"I believe this hospital, without a doubt, is going to be sued by many angry patients and families thanks to their horrendous lack of background checks so you should feel happy that you're getting out before the media gets word of it."

"Happy?" A _completely_ ladylike snort escaped me. "I'm fucking elated. Can't you see my toes just tingling with excitement? I can't wait to get the hell away from this circus of retards."

Signaling the security—whom had changed some time during our session from the rough looking blonde to a scrawny red head that reminded me of a Fraggle doll—to come in. "Mr. Bloom, can you please escort Ms. Swan back to her room and tell the nurse to send in the next patient, please."

At my expression Dr. Evred removed his glasses, briefly cleaning them with the edge of his sleeve, before looking at me with his uninterested stare. "All the paperwork should be pushed through by tomorrow, so expect to be released in the morning if all is finished by then."

I nodded, not even going to give him a response as Wanna-Be-Buff-Fraggle put a hand on my shoulder to lead me out. As I reached the door, however, Dr. Evred's voice met my ears. "It has been a pleasure, Ms. Swan; you are quite the intelligent and amusing woman, but despite that I do recommend you seeking anger management classes for the first few weeks that you are out of this facility. If you would like, I can also get in touch with my friend Dr. Conrad so that you may relieve yourself of the memories that you harbor from your previous relationship and the outcome of it."

Turning slightly to him, I expected a sudden rush of anger to fill me at his words but it was absent. The certified mind fucker actually meant well and I respected that. "The world should be full of more genuinely helpful people like you," I told him, eyes leveling his. "But I'm not the type to articulate my feelings, Doctor. This was, regrettably, a one-time situation. Thank you, though, for your evaluation and recommendations."

"Let's go, Fraggle," I muttered to the ginger, giving him a slight push out the door, choosing to ignore his sudden sputtering at the nickname.

"Ma'am, I am a man of the law and you can't j-"

I swiftly cut him off, turning to hiss at him, "I honestly couldn't give a fuck who the hell you are." I was so fucking _done_ with this place. The restless need to get out of here was building in me, stronger than before now that I knew that it was actually happening, and my legs ached with it. I couldn't stand any of St. John's staff any longer.

His eyes widened and he took a brief step backward before quickly moving back to his spot to regain his masculinity in a weak attempt to assert his dominance. A few nurses passing by took a brief glance at us, one of them—the blonde named Greta—sighing in her blatant irritation. Whenever I was given the sedatives, it was her who had the divine privilege of pushing down my pants and shoving the needle into the pale apple of my ass. Resisting the urge to cast a satisfied smirk in her direction I focused back on the man in front of me.

Before he could even get another word out I folded my arms, eyeing him warily. "Look. I honestly don't want any more trouble. As you heard I'm finally getting the hell out of here, so it's pretty obvious that I'm going to be suing the _hell_ out of this place for wrongly keeping me here because of their bullshit psychologist. If you don't want me to start with you then I'd shut the hell up and just do your fucking job of taking me back to my goddamn room." It was obvious that even if I were starting a law suit—which you bet your fucking ass I was—that it didn't work in the way of suing individual staff members, rather than the hospital as a whole. Though, obviously, Fraggle here was a dumbass and didn't know that.

His mouth flopped open briefly, and after a particularly stiff Edward-like response of, "A lady shouldn't talk like that" I found myself just doing the favor of going ahead, raising my middle finger in clear view above my head as I left, and walking myself back to my hall. The thundering steps of him running, however, told me that he was following and I sighed tiredly.

The walk to my room was quiet, despite the fact that I could feel the red Fraggle's glare on the side of my neck as I walked. Apparently, I had offended him. He truly did remind me so much of Edward. The silent, Fraggle haired brooder who couldn't stand confrontation.

Mikayla was waiting outside of my room, a nurse standing by her side as a chaperon. As soon as her eyes landed on me they lit up and I couldn't help the smile that stretched across my lips. Unable to suppress the happiness that swept my emotions, I positively beamed at her. The uncharacteristic expression of mine caused her to blink warily at me before she finally understood what I was wordlessly telling her.

_I was a free motherfucker. _

"I'm so happy," she cheered, tears filling her eyes as she launched herself at me with such a force that it almost knocked me back into Fraggle.

I laughed at her face buried within the pink of my uniform top, reaching my thumbs down to smooth the tears away. "Why are you crying?" I asked softly, a smile shaping my lips.

"Happy tears, you idiot," she mumbled, gray eyes blinking up at me, shining with their depths. "Happy tears." My fingers found her hair, stroking it soothingly as I shook my head.

The nurse smiled softly at our familial display and nodded her head slightly to me, expression approving, before motioning for the security detail—whom of which was still glaring his ass off at me—to follow her down the hall.

Satisfied that the nurse was gone, she pulled her head off of stomach and shot me a mischievous glance, pulling me inside our door and shutting it behind us.

"I'm out of here too," she told me, a conspiracy tone taking on her voice. Technically, we weren't allowed to tell each other who was leaving or not since apparently it could cause someone to inadvertently to have a panic attack or some other shit that didn't make since like that.

"He said that I have Bi-polar Disorder but it's nothing that meds can't regulate so I'm free to go later tonight when my parents come."

I wanted to tell her about my session as well, but the happiness that I felt paused as the weight of what she was saying finally settled.

"Where will I go?" whispered into the air between us. Her gray eyes were once again water, seeking mine. "They've already called my parents and they want me back, but I don't want to go."

Fuck, don't say it, kid. The edged set to my shoulders tensed as she spoke.

"I want to stay with you, Bella," she blubbered, tears slipping down her cheeks.

Sighing, I wrapped her in another hug, trying to soothe the heavy sobs that were tearing out of her throat. "I-I talked to them a-a-and my mom said that I should c-come home for the family b-because they need the mo-ney that they'll get wh-when they sue here." The tears clogging her throat garbled the words that she was trying to say and I barely managed to understand her.

The fuck. They just wanted her for the money.

"You can come live with me." The words had slipped out of my mouth before I had truly thought about them.

Hell, college was out for now so that left my college fund available for use. I had enough money to support us until I would be able to find a job. We could get as far as fucking away from here as possible. No weight on our shoulders, nothing but each other and the clothes on our backs.

"Even I know that's just a wish. They have custody of me," she told me, a knowing gaze in her eyes. She was growing up, growing wiser, losing that naivety that she had once had. I couldn't tell if that was a good or bad thing, and that had me worried. Her parents were fucking assholes and I wanted nothing more than to shove my fists through their skulls for their plan to exploit her like this.

Her emotions switching again, finally explained by Dr. Evred's diagnosis, her legs extended on to her tiptoes and she wrapped her arms around me loosely. "I love you, Mom." This time she said it when I knew that she was awake, her eyes staring into mine with such trust and adoration that I couldn't even shy away from it because it wrapped around me so suddenly. This maternal feeling that I felt, and had almost given up for someone who didn't even truly love me, filled me with determination. This was what Rosalie had been afraid of me giving up, and even if I was only approaching my twenties I could see what she had meant. It was encompassing, this feeling.

"I love you too, Mikayla." My eyes found hers, as I pulled back from the hug, insistent. "I'll come visit you. I promise, okay? You can visit me any time you want to."

Her eyes found mine, not believing and knowing that I knew that it couldn't happen either once her parents had word of me and who I was. After all, I wouldn't blame them for that. Who would want an acquitted murderer with anger issues acting as a parental figure towards _their_ daughter?

Rather than acknowledging that aloud, Mikayla let us continue to live within the craving for the false idea, allowed us to pretend that we weren't going to be split up at the first ray of the morning dawn tomorrow.

"Come on," I said, trying to fight the sadness that was sifting through me, demanding that I notice its presence. "It's late."

The next few hours, Mikayla practically clung my side, and I let her, until finally her eyes were too heavy for her to keep open due to her new medication. When she had relented, nestling within her own bed, I silently slipped out into the hallway.

Most of the security was on the west side of the mental ward to be close to Dr. Evred in case one of the patients he was evaluating had an episode and attacked him, so walking to Adam's room, which was a hall over, wasn't a task.

I already knew that Adam most likely would be kept here at the hospital to deal with his kleptomania but there was a possibility that they would just send him to counseling for it and let him out of St. John's.

"Fairy Goddess is pleased that I'm still here. You should stay here too, Bella," Ernest whispered, appearing in the dark doorway of his room as I passed. His eyes shined brightly, shimmering with insanity, and I quickened my pace but not before letting him know now that I wouldn't be seeing him again, "Fuck the fairies, Ernest. Fuck their goddess, and fuck them."

His sudden screeching of outrage had me sprinting as no doubt a nurse would hurry over to sedate him. Fuck, that wasn't intelligent.

"Adam," I whispered hastily, knocking on his door quickly, my eyes darting around as I heard footsteps down the hall. "Adam." I knocked again. "_Adam_, open up, they're around the corner." The shadow of the person came closer and I muttered, "Fuck." Leave it to me to fuck up on my last day here and get caught.

Not wanting to get bitched at, and not caring all too much if he was changing I slipped into the room, shutting the door. Ducking, my eyes watched as a nurse, who had most likely attended to Ernest, passed by, chatting it up with a security guard who was carrying the array of sedatives.

"What the fuck, man?" I hissed, once they had gone, as I whirled around, ready to chuck something at his head. "Why didn't yo-" My voice cut off as I stepped forward to flick on the light, a liquid soaking my sock covered feet.

All the heat in my body drained in one fluid motion as my eyes recognized the thickness to the liquid. "_Adam._"

The light flickered on as my palm fell from the switch numbly, illuminating the decapitated head staring blankly at me. The body, a river a red still running down its paled neck, sat in the corner, propped up in a mocking manner that gave the guise of a peaceful death that had obviously not been present. Skin, wretched off of his arms, covered the wall in the spelling of one word: B.E.L.L.A. Sinewy tendons throbbed nakedly, his body still producing blood as it shivered down the palpitating muscles and onto the whitened floor.

Fire flickered in my peripheral vision.

She moved languidly as I held my breath, her body living dexterity, every movement savoring this moment. Her ear twitched as she listened to the sound of my heart crashing into my ribs as it sprinted in my chest.

"Victoria…" My breath exhaled from me in a whoosh as her scarlet eyes flitted to mine so fast that I stumbled backward, slipping and falling back as gravity forced me into the puddle of blood with a splash, a sound emitting briefly from the floorboard.

Deep down I had known that she was coming. The male vampire that I had seen while with Adam the other day confirmed that, but I was too stupid. I tried to push that out of my mind, tell myself that I had imagined it, so that I continue here with him and Mikayla for the last few days until I was released. I had at least thought that Victoria would have waited until I had it all—money from the lawsuit, a new house, a new job, a new life—before finally coming after me. I thought that I had time. I had thought…

The metallic smell of his blood, splaying on my face as I tried to stand myself up, had my head swimming. Every breath that I took in was Adam. All fucking Adam.

Looking up at her, my face shattered with pain as I tried to comprehend everything, I was met with an elated smile curving her ruby lips. "I killed him. His screams were…_delicious_." A shiver of pleasure ran through her body, and she ran her hands down her curves, staining her ripped clothing with scarlet. "He begged me not to hurt you," she whispered, though it felt like she was screaming. "I wasn't going to kill him but when he groveled for _you_." Her lips pulled back from her teeth and she snarled, the sound making me close my eyes tightly.

Mikayla…was she gone yet? She was fucking covered in my scent. Please let her parents have taken her far away.

"When he fucking groveled for you, I couldn't help myself. _How_ _dare he_. _How dare he_ beg for me to spare _your_ life."

The black that had slithered into her eyes slowly lightened back into the color of blood, and she moved forward, causing me to scramble back, once again falling into the puddle of scarlet. It drenched my hair, the warmth soaking my face and clothes, staining the pink.

"Adam…" Shudders raked my body, shock setting in. "Adam…"

No.

_No_.

No…

"_Adam. Adam_," Victoria mocked in a nasally voice that still managed to sound like bells, her fingers twisting in the dark hair of his head as she yanked it upwards. "He's not here now," she whispered as she brought the head level to hers and she caressed his lips, cocking her head to the side as she smiled sweetly at him despite the fact that he couldn't see. "No one is. You're all alone. Just how you should be." With her last words she reached out, free hand clamping down tightly around my arm.

Wind rushed into my ears, pricking at my skin, before I was violently shoved away from the force, hitting a tree roughly. The bark bit into the skin of my back as I fell, pine needles sticking my skin. My head swam with nausea as I suddenly found myself in the middle of the woods, my mind fighting to catch up with the sudden change of scenery.

A heavy thump filled the air as the orange-haired vampire tossed the decapitated head towards me. I closed my eyes, tears leaking out, as it hit my chest before falling to the pine below.

My eyes fell on Adam's face, which was so peaceful that it made me want to fucking laugh in my growing hysteria. With a simple flick of her finger Adam's skull fell apart, collapsing in on itself as the smell of broken flesh hit my nose, making me retch inside my mouth. Spitting the bile out to the side, I breathed heavily, trying to reign in my quickly panicking emotions.

"Do you know what it's like to consume your lover in the midst of grief?" Her hand ripped into my chin as she forced me to my feet and to look at her, my terrified expression reflecting back to me from within her red eyes. Was this how it was going to end? Me watching myself die? "I consumed his _ashes_," she hissed so passionately that venom leaked down her chin and flew onto my face. "James is always going to be a part of me now, and I'm going to finish what he started once I've had my revenge. I'm going to rip you apart in every possible way while making sure that you're still alive for it all. I've spent a so long working on my bloodlust so that I wouldn't lose control like last time, so don't bother begging for death, bitch. Anyone you've ever cared about will be wiped out quicker than you can blink. I'm going to fucking _ruin_ you better than that pathetic human of yours ever did, and then when I'm done I'm going to drain your pathetic body before tossing your carcass aside to the dogs."

I could barely see as her hand came at me faster than I could comprehend, shoving something down my throat despite my kicking and screaming to get away from her. It wasn't until she pulled her hand out, the leftover graying pink chunks slipping from her fingers that I understood what it was. Adam's skull shined, a piece where brain was supposed to be bare so that I could see the other side of it dusty white.

I choked, falling on to my knees as my hands scratched at my throat, nails coming away red with my own blood. My eyes burned with tears as I dry heaved, trying to throw it back up, but no matter how much my stomach vacillated within itself it refused to expel the matter.

"Oh, Bella." Her innocuous voice enshrouded the trees, the air, my mind, becoming all that I could hear. Her bare feet came into view as she walked closer before leaning down, that signature catlike grin returning to her features as her darkening eyes grew pleasurably sadistic. Latching on to my ankle, the blood her nails elicited not even bothering her in the slightest, she began to drag me deeper into the forest—my screams echoing to no one.

"We're going to have so much fun together."

**Ending A/N: So, any ideas on the identity of the red-eyed vampire from the previous chapter? If you review with your guess and it's correct, then I'll give you a lengthy preview of the next chapter. If it's wrong, well…I'll just tell you so and thank you for your review lol. **

**Now for my insecurities: *Nervous look* I hope that lived up to expectations. I actually had trouble measuring out how fucked up Victoria was going to be in this chapter, so let me know if I did well or if it sucked monkey butt.**

**I'm at my grandmother's house—lmao thank hell she isn't reading this—and she's asleep on the couch and mumbling, no joke, about cheese and crackers so it's probably time for me to go to bed myself before I laugh too loudly at her and wake her up. **

**Please review. Sometimes they make updates come faster and earlier and longer^^**

**~Eryn**


	3. Chapter 3

**Title: **Blue Perfection

**Author: **Eryn "Ninja" Silvenia

**Chapter:** 3

**Summary: **Look up, thanks to fanfiction's new layout.

**Disclaimer: **Do I own Twilight? Fuck no. 'Nuff said.

**A/N: YES! I like to leave lengthy author notes. Sue me. Most of the time, though, they **_**are**_** important!**

**Anyways, **

**I have to admit I feel really crappy about having not updated yet ( It's been over three months! TT^TT), but I was extremely ill and then had a surgery to correct said illness. Then, I started to bury myself in summer work because school starts in around the 27****th**** of August and college even sooner than that (the 17****th****) so I'm already swamped in school work. Now that school is here I get home around 8:30 and don't get to sleep until around 3am, then have to get up at 6am to repeat the dreaded process of school. ****So, when I use the excuse of "I don't have the time to work on fanfiction this week" please understand that it is a legitimate reason and that I'm not just being lazy and dissing you guys!**** That and I have a family problem that's still going on—you'll find that I'll be having a lot of those *sigh***

**However! *shiny stars floating around my 'I can do it' anime pose* I finally was able to write this after I forced my sorry self away from my work each night to write a little bit on this. Sorry that it took so long to get this out, but I'm dividing the "five minutes left a night" between this and a new fanfiction called **_**Chrysanthemum**_** that I'm working on. (Naturally, it's another Peter/Bella, but I have no idea when I'll be posting it)**

**Now****, most of those who did review last chapter (Who am I kidding? Practically **_**all**_** of you lol) were pretty positive that Peter was the mysterious male-window-vamp. Well, read to find out if you guys were right :P**

*****Warning:**!Be prepared for some major OOC right now for Bella. Why? Starting off with a flashback, people^^** I was only going to put in half of it, but to say sorry for such a long wait I put it all in. **

***$$$***Also, I was originally going to have this flashback and Chapter 4 combined to make Ch. 3, but with all my schoolwork I won't be able to get it out this weekend. The flashback was the only thing completely finished so I decided to go ahead and post it as its own chapter. Hope you enjoy it!

**Chapter Three**

"_What's going on?" were the first words out of my mouth as I walked tentatively down the staircase, the fact that I had just accidentally intruded in on something blatantly obvious. My eyes switched between them. _

_Charlie wasn't even looking up at the sound of my voice, his head buried in his hands as he leaned forward on the edge of the dark couch. His elbows were practically digging into his knees. _

_Renee was sitting next to him, the darkly colored pencil skirt she was wearing shifted slightly as she crossed her legs, her hand swallowed in the embrace of her husband's clasp. _

_For the first time since my childhood my parents were sitting in the same room and not arguing. Warning bells were flashing in my head and my legs were practically screaming at me to go back upstairs, but the heavy weight in the atmosphere kept me rooted to the step._

_Phil's eyes were trained on my mother, his hands flexing briefly as they squeezed hers, prompting. One glance at me from him and I instantly felt my blood chill with foreboding; that greed brewing in him, it was one of the reasons that I left Phoenix in the first place. The driving force behind him was pure ambition, that much was evident in his pursued career, but it was crystal clear in his gaze the first time he shook my hand that one of the things that he surely didn't want as a barely thirty-two year old man was to be a stepfather. _

_Words stumbled in my throat as my mother's finely powdered face, complete with perfectly dealt eyeliner and bubblegum pink lipstick, finally rose to meet mine. Her crystal blue eyes were no longer filled with the carefree laughter that had painted them all my life, rather determination bled forward, becoming the prominent emotion in them at Phil's hand moving to pat her leg in encouraging comfort._

_My tongue slid over the achingly dried skin of my lips, my arm wrapping around my torso and my nails biting through the sleeve of my sweater as I opened and closed my mouth, trying to wrap my head around the odd situation. My voice seemed garbled, lost in all of my confusion, making it come out shakily. "D-Did someone di—"_

"_Bella," she instantly cut me off, her voice diving sharply into the air, making me grip my arm even tighter. A cold wave emanated throughout my body, my mouth abruptly snapping shut in response to the hostility in her voice. "That's enough." _

"_What's going o—"_

"_I said that's enough, Bella! That's enough!" _

_I stared blankly at my mother, shock radiating from my form as I tried to comprehend the sudden stern component to her voice that she had lacked throughout the span of my life. _

_Phil leaned into her side, whispering what vaguely sounded like reassuring things in her ear, his hands grasping hers tightly before relaxing. A pat on her leg prompted his wife once more. _

_She raised a hand to her throat, trying to cling to the façade of calm that she exuded as she attempted to hide her nervous swallow. "You're not…" Her voice was shaky before she cleared her throat daintily and continued, any sense of reluctance that she had possessed before all but vanishing as she brazenly stated, "Sweetheart, you're not well." _

"_Not well? _Jesus Christ_, Renee," Charlie hissed lowly, his voice choked with emotion as he looked up long enough to send a heated glare her way, showing his blotchily reddened face. He wiped his face with his hand, the skin coming back damp before he returned his gaze to the carpet, his last words only a whisper. "That's my baby girl…" _

_The sight of my father—chief of police and emotional illiterate—getting so visibly upset over something shook me mentally and physically, and I squeezed my arm tighter as if it would stop the shakes that had taken me over. _

_Phil's eyes were trained on Charlie, irritation framing his features, and he was definitely opening his mouth to say something that would've made his pain even worse so I pushed myself to speak. _

"_Is this an intervention? I-I know that I've been really hard to d-deal with since the trial, but…" I fumbled to find the right words to help them realize that I was working on getting back to how I was before Denis. Before Edward. Before _Forks_. "I called last night and set up an appointment with Dr. Martinez for next Tuesday." To say the truth, I didn't want counseling but Phil had been so insistent lately that I wasn't acting like myself, and Phil being insistent meant that my mother was as well. _

_Everything was telling me to get out of here, but I continued. I wanted them to see. I wanted them to see that I was trying for them, to be the daughter that they wanted so they wouldn't have to worry about me anymore._

"_She specializes in trauma victims so she'll be—"_

"_You're not the victim here, Bella!" Renee's sudden shout silenced anything I had to say. Her eyes were hard, her hand tightening around Phil's as he nodded his agreement. "You killed that poor boy, and you don't even feel guilty!"_

"_Guilty? I don't feel guilty? Of course I do but he abused me for months! He tried to _kill_ me, Renee. I almost _died_ a few months ago!"_

"_See! See!" she all but screamed at me. Her wildly flashing eyes turned to Charlie's. "Don't you see?"_

"_Now just wait a minute, Renee," Charlie started to say, moving to stand up, but his voice was lost as she once again turned her eyes to mine, all composure going out the window. _

_Phil, however, was the only calm one. The eye at the center of the storm—of this growing disaster. His muscles shuddered in a stretch as he leaned against the cushions, arms spread out over the back of the couch, watching with bored eyes the cacophony that was quickly escalating._

"_I know you two have talked about it but I see nothing wrong with he-" Charlie, usually gruff and quiet, was now prominent in the room as he glared at her, dark brown eyes and badge flashing. But Renee, as usual, didn't even look at him and overstepped him with a simple push of a dismissive, dainty hand against his chest. _

_She took a step in front of him so that she was in my line of view, but she wasn't who I was staring at. "Look at me, Isabella Marie! Look. At. Me." _

_My eyes flitted from Phil's, instantly being rendered immobile by the tears forming in hers. _

_She walked towards the stairs, the saltwater swimming among crystal blue, before she was close enough for me to reach out to cling to her. To hug her and tell her that she wasn't making sense, like I had so many times before—while living with her—when I was dissuading her crazy ideas. But looking at her right now, as I was stumbling backwards over the last step at the determination in her eyes, I knew that whatever idea she had been entertaining would not be deterred, no matter how much I tried._

"_You're going to go get some help."_

"_I-I am…"_

"_No, baby," she told me, her voice suddenly softening despite the hard look in her eyes. It was odd seeing her so set on something. She had always been the flighty one, the only time she was determined to do something when she was going through one of her phases. "You're not. You need more help than a simple psychia—"_

"_That's far enough, Renee! She's been acting just like the doctor said she would be after what happened! You're not going to be taking her anywh-"_

"_Oh, _shutup,_ Charlie!" Renee hissed as she whirled on him, her heels clacking harshly against the wooden floor as she stalked up to him quickly. His height seemed to swallow hers with just his shadow, but that didn't stop her from clenching her fists as she screamed, anger blazing in her gaze. "You don't have custody of her, I do, so just shut up. This is a matter that concerns family!"_

_Unable to find my voice among everything that was going on, I just wanted to put my hands over my ears to block everything out just like a child, but I couldn't even find the will in myself to do that. _

"_Bella," Phil suddenly said, drawing my attention to him as he finally cashed into the playing field and came closer to me. "You haven't shown any remorse towards killing Denis. That's not normal. You haven't been to visit his grave or even apologized to his family. You never talk about him and you've been nothing but selfish about it. Renee is right. You're not the one who died that day, he is, and you should be ashamed of yourself. You ended another person's life. You're not normal anymore. Far from it."_

_The poisonous words fell from his lips, sounding almost soothing, his voice persuasive. They were reverberating in my ears, almost as if I wasn't really hearing him. I hadn't even noticed when my knees gave out and I found myself falling to the floor, eyes training on the polished brown of the floorboards. Sounds of Renee's verbal battering of Charlie had fallen as I heard the soft thud as he fell back to the couch, resigned._

_Phil knelt down so that he was eye level with me, his fingers lifting my chin up as he murmured, convincing, "You need help, Bella, and we know where to get you it." _

_I blinked lazily, feeling almost as if my head was underwater as I realized what he was truly saying. He just didn't want me telling my psychiatrist. Mrs. Martinez, any psychiatrist really, from there would encourage me to tell my mother. _

_A week or two after he had married my mom, Phil came home drunk, and had slipped into my room while I was sleeping, waking me up abruptly. He hadn't necessarily gone through with it that night, but he had implied it in smooth, slurred tones and suggestively placed caresses. After that he had showered me with apologies and how he had thought that I was Renee, but no matter how many times I told him that it was alright, that I understood that he was just drunk, he persisted on me keeping it from her. Soon, though, he began to give up the façade and drank whenever Renee wasn't home so that it would serve as an excuse when he would try to pursue me. Locking myself in my bathroom had become a nightly routine, cringes surfacing every time that his fists rained down on the door until he grew too tired to even bother anymore that night. _

_More convincing apologies from Phil and the sad look that my mother's joyous blue eyes had taken on had me rethinking my residency status. Eventually, I decided that he and my mother needed to reconnect, since I was just a crowding third wheel anyways, so that was when I made the decision to move to Forks. Without me there, Renee would be happy at finally being able quit the extra job—that she had taken on to support all of us until the start of the baseball season—and would be elated at the fact that she'd have more time to spend with her husband. And Phil would open up to her more, forgetting about whatever sick attraction he held for me. _

_Everyone would be happier than they had been in a long time. _

_But, now… I wasn't going to relocate just to accommodate them or their marriage problems anymore. They didn't have to stay here after the trial, they could've went home. _

"_I'm _not _crazy_,_" I murmured, my eyes burning into his, swirling with more emotion than they had in a while. "And I'm _not _going _anywhere_. This is my and Charlie's house. How dare you….how dare _both of you_," I hissed as I rose shakily to my feet, clenching my fists to stop the sudden onslaught of anger that was taking me over. "come into our house and take over everything. You can't deny us our opinion." I whirled on my mother, taking in her shocked gaze as I continued. "You have no right to tell him that he isn't a part of this family. He is my _father_ and an amazing one at that. There is _nothing_ wrong with me at all for not wanting to prance around town sobbing my eyes out over a man who tried to murder me. You need to take your husband, shut the hell up, and get the hell out of here!" _

_A brief silence settled over the living room, and the fierce bravado that I had been infected with just a few moments ago was quickly fading; I wasn't feeling as confident as before now that Phil's eyes were narrowed in inexplicable anger at me, my mother's mouth still flopped open unattractively in her shock. _

_Charlie, however, was still sitting on the couch, defeat curling around his person in the set of his body language. It was almost as if he hadn't heard me speak at all. _

_He had always been a soft spoken, reserved man, and that was something that I had always been thankful for, since he wasn't one to press or pry. But now was the time that I needed him standing up next to me, laying a large, supportive hand on my shoulder as if lending me his strength just through touch. _

_Tears tracked his face, having long dried up and rendering his eyes red and glossy as he looked up at me, a hand rubbing down his face again as he tried to clear the stress eating away at him from his expression. "Bells…"_

_In just that one utterance of my name I could tell that he wasn't going to say anything to stop them. Heat burned in me—whether it was anger, shame, fear, sadness, or some indistinguishable mixture of all four, I couldn't tell. _

"_Bella…sweetie…" Renee whispered brokenly as she reached a hand out towards me before pulling it back against her chest with the other, blue eyes shimmering with unshed tears. "I only want what's best for you…"_

"_What's best for me? Renee, I'm eighteen years old. You don't have custody of me; I'm my own person. For once in your life can you act like a mother and respect my decision?" My voice was as low as hers, anger simmering but softer than it was before. It filled the room, swelling with the emotion as it clashed with those of the others in the air._

_A loud knocking reverberated through the house, slicing through the almost tangible tension. My infuriated gaze lingered on my mother a bit longer. _

_Her eyes, slanted with a grief that I couldn't fathom, fell as guilt began to seep into her posture. _

"_Who's at the door?" I hissed, only to be rewarded by silence. A brief shudder manifested through Charlie's body, but other than that he remained quiet, face still buried in his hands. "Is this another decision that you've already made for me? Who's at the fucking door?" The first expletive that I had said in my life slipped out of my mouth, relieving some of my anger and directing it at them as my voice took over the presence of the room. _

"_What?" The mumblings of my mother prompted the response._

_Her hands were held close to her chest, fingertips just skimming above her heart, as she locked her gaze onto mine. Porcelain skin stretched as cotton candy lips parted. "S-Sweetie…calm down. Don't you think that it's a little odd that you're getting so mad over someone coming to help you?"_

_I was _done_ letting people walk all over me. I tried—_desperately—_to cling to who I once was, but something about Denis, something about Edward, had sparked a deep well of anger in me that I had kept buried for all this time. _

"_I'm not going anywhere."_

_Pain filtered through me as I felt a nail tear as I practically threw the door open, fully prepared to tell whoever was there to kindly go to hell. _

_Jacob stood in the doorway, his tanned hand raised to rap against the wood of the door once more. His free hand was slipped in the pocket of his ripped blue jeans—stained with dried dirt and oil. The once long, midnight dark locks that I had adored on him had been shorn, his hair failing just short of his ears. It ruined the airy, carefree image that my mind conjured up of the days working with him in his garage. Dark brown eyes lowered to mine, flitting quickly as he read my own, his voice rumbling from him in a way that was anything but innocent. _

"_Bells." Innocence of that nickname washed over me. _

"_No." The curt tone in my voice shocked me, but I stood my ground, not letting it show on my face as my hand gripped the doorknob, pain flooding my fingers at the pressure I was exuding. _

"_You know." It was a statement rather than a question. Caution tinged his features and his posture was tense as he looked at me. "Why are you here, Jacob?"_

"_Bells, you need this." The words leaving his lips practically slapped me in the face, making my fist tighten at my side despite the calm façade I was trying so hard to keep. _

_I leaned against the doorway, trying to ignore the burning feel that was fluttering through my veins, demanding that I give into the anger. "No. I don't." _

"_I'm tired of everyone constantly making decisions for me! I have never said anything _all my fucking life _because I wanted nothing more than for all of you to be happy! _Why_ don't any of you get that I'm fine? This is completely normal!" I hissed, my anger only increasing as I felt hot tears pour down my face as I turned around to glare at my family so that they could see just what their lack of support was doing to me. _

_My body chilled as I noticed that Charlie, Renee, and Phil were all walking towards me, discretely stationing themselves at each possible exit that I could take. They were herding me towards the door, like I was some type of feral animal. A shiver shuddered through my bones involuntarily as my eyes locked onto Phil's. _

"_You can't do this to me," I whispered, all traces of anger having disappeared from my voice as I realized that I was completely outnumbered and completely trapped. _

_Dark brown eyes, shades different from my own muddy color, stared indifferently at my own. They spoke clearly, though_. Why would I help you, Bella? This way you'll never tell. No one will ever know.

_And all too soon for me to comprehend, his lips were at my ear—my skin crawled—his words were fleeting. "No one will believe you in there. No one will help you. No one will care. Besides," He pulled back to scan my features, which were taut with angered desperation. "You do realize that you _are_ crazy, right?"_

_His words took me by surprise—it was the first time that any of them had used the word crazy out loud in reference to me—enough for him to shove me out the door and into Jacob's arms, which clamped down around me like a steel cage._

"_Let go of me!" I screeched, coming to life again. My hair splayed everywhere, whirling as I kicked and struggled to get free. A grunt slipped through his lips each time my nails raked across his arm and when dark scarlet sprung free I felt satisfaction. But he kept moving, eyes zeroed in on nothing but his Rabbit. _

_Words fell from him, I could feel them through the movement of his chest, but they hit my terrified ears in broken sentences. "Help….not….Bells…don't do this to yourself." _

I hate you, I hate all of you_, my mind was screaming, tears slipping down my cheeks as I tried to dig deeper into Jacob's skin to free myself. But it was as simple as freeing yourself from a cage with a nail file. I was in such a panicked frenzy to get free that my fingers mistook my skin for his—despite their difference in color—and I gasped as the sting of broken skin rippled through me._

"_Stop it, Bells! Just fucking stop it!" Jacob's voice cut through me as his arms tightened around me to the point where I could feel my skin squishing against my bones. My heart thudded in my chest, its beat doing nothing to stop the idiotic words that he was throwing at me. "We're just trying to help you!"_

_The tip of my elbow found his stomach, but to no avail. He didn't even flinch when one of my legs rammed into his crotch hard enough to take down any grown man. The only response was a soft growl that filtered through his lips._

"_You can't keep me there! I'm not crazy!" The hysterical edge to my voice permeated the air as I realized that we were only a few feet away from the car that would seal my fate and my life. In desperation my eyes sought out my father, the cry ripping from me in a shrill screech that brought the attention of the neighbor's enough for them to peek out their blinds. "_Daddy!"

_A flinch shuddered through his body, ricocheting through my own as he lowered his eyes before turning around and going back into the house. The sudden weight weighing down my bones, settled on my chest, making it hard to breathe as I gasped through the pain of his rejection. _

"_You're being selfish, Bella," Jacob said, dumping me into his car like I was nothing more than trash, not even bothering to drop me out of the way of the shifter—which pushed into my side painfully. "You're not giving a shit about anyone else but yourself and that's messed up."_

_Anger fueling me, I launched forward, my fist collided with his face—which caused a jolt of pain to surge up my arm, but it barely registered. Adrenaline was pumping through me. If they were going to treat me like a caged animal, then they were going to get one. "All my life, I've done _nothing_ but care about everyone else," I hissed._

_He pulled back, curses on his lips, and quickly slammed the door, managing to click the lock on his keys just as I lurched forward to escape._

_Son of a mother fucking…_

_My eyes flitted to the ignition only to find it devoid of a key. Frantically I started turning over anything to look for a spare. I shoved papers off the seats, his sunglasses breaking in the process as my hands poured over the leather seats in an effort to find anything to help me get out. _

_I glanced up._

_Renee was running towards Jacob's bent-over form, a shout of "Oh my god!" escaping her as she saw the blood pouring from him. _

_Screams of frustration finally tore from my throat as my hands blindly searched in the seat behind me for anything to use. Fingers closing in on the neck of something slender and cool, I lurched it forward. The glass bottle shattered against the rolled up window, shards scattered themselves back at me, cutting through my sweater and nicking the skin of my arms. _

_Almost instantly at the sound, Jacob turned around—eyes thick with disbelief and blood smeared around his face. His exclamation of, "What the hell, Bella?!" was muffled, and my muscles tensed as his pressed the unlock button. _

_My breathing was ragged as I tried to get to the opposite door, my fingers just brushing the dark of the handle before I felt myself being roughly drawn back by my ankles. My eyes fluttered, tears hanging on my lashes. It was all over, and I knew it. There would be no coming out of this. I was going to be locked in a place for insane people, and I would never be heard from again. This was it—I could feel it. This was the last glimpse of the outside that I would get. _

"_Stop it, Bella! Stop it!" He leaned further into the car, pulling me up to face him as he shook me violently, as if that would get the message into my brain. "Stop it! We're helping you! Just stop it!"_

_That promise almost blindsided the sting of the needle as it kissed my neck, plunging its most of its contents into my veins just as I hit my head against Jacob's cheek suddenly—eliciting a loud curse. Taking his momentary pause to my advantage, my hand once again lunged for the door but he quickly recovered, large arms wrapping around me to keep me still despite my kicking and screaming as he pressed his thumb fully down on the plunger. _

"_No….Stop….Please…Jac…" Everything became excruciatingly hazy, my head suddenly feeling heavy and my tongue fuzzy as my mind tried to comprehend what was going on. Faintly I could hear Renee's hastily yelled directions to Seattle past the thickness of the glass, feel the rumble of the car as it started. Ill given promises and quick glances at me that gave sickly sweet lying guarantees that everything would be alright. _

"_It'll be okay, sweetheart…"_

_A bitter lullaby._

"_We'll come see you soon…"_

_Just words._

"_Bella…"_

_All jumbling together._

"_This is for your…"_

_Until I couldn't make anything out of them anymore._

When my head finally thudded against the window, the glass distorted scenery whisking past, I knew that when I woke up, I would be confined to a place that I didn't want to be.

The only difference from then and now was that even without opening my eyes, I could tell that I wasn't anywhere near the hospital.

**So, it is finally revealed exactly why Bella hates Renee—as she said, if you remember, in Ch. 2 to Dr. Evred. Phil's a creep, ne? Before anyone asks, **_**yes, he is a sociopath. **_

**I was really nervous about writing that since it was—hopefully—as emotional chapter that I didn't want to get wrong, so I hope you all liked it. If you did, or didn't, please tell me so in a review^^ Even just one word reviews make me happy, and fuels the muses that push me to update early ;D**

**Normally I don't do this early on but I'm going to go ahead and make a minor (but detrimental) OC available. To win him or her you need to go onto facebook ( Friend **_**Eryn Silvenia**_**) and post on my wall a song on my wall that could be used for Blue Perfection's trailer (Which I will be doing when I get the chance). In the comment section of that post, please post the lyrics as well. Songs without words will be accepted as well!**

**Keep in mind that this will have action so it can't just be a constant slow song!**

**I'd like to make clear: The OCs will **_**not**_** be major characters, nor will they show up in more than one or two chapters (with the exemption of a few that will be able to be won later). Winning an OC means that the character will be modeled after your looks, personality, etc.**

**Now that everything in my life is calming down and finding a routine, I'll be doing weekly updates once again. Always on Saturday or Sunday! This also means that during the week (Every day!) I'll be posting a quote, snippet, and picture that alludes to the upcoming chapter on the weekend on my facebook. And if I feel especially happy after school and I'm done all my homework, I'll even do a short video preview. **

**I accept all friend requests since it's not my personal Facebook, so yeah…Friend me ;D and follow my statuses holding hints and updates on the state of the chapters. **

**Also, go take the poll on the profile! It affects how soon Peter comes in, oddly enough lol.**

**~Eryn "Ninja" Silvenia**


	4. Chapter 4

**B/N: Sorry, everyone for not posting this for Eryn sooner! She gave it to me about two weeks ago and I just now got around to doing it. Forgive me and don't set the Volturi on me! MEEEERRRRY CHRISTMAS, EVERYONE! HAPPY NEW YEARS EVE! OH! Reviews now equal previews of the next chappy to come ;D -Leslie**

_**1A/N: Happy Holidays everyone and Happy New Year's Eve. Thanks to my lovely friend, Leslioma, for beta-ing this~ And Happy Holidays. Also, major thanks goes out to my three best friends—Leslioma, Darlene, and Megan. Leslie for being the awesome beta she is, Darlene for dealing with my bitchy whines of "I'm stuck; inspire me, woman", and Megan for letting me use a piece of her poem to open up the chapter. **_

**Title: **Blue Perfection

**Author: **Eryn "Ninja" Silvenia

**Chapter:** 4

**Summary: **Look up, thanks to fanfiction's new layout. XD

**Extra: **The song that Victoria is humming…If you want, go to Youtube, search A Haunting Melody (15) Piano Composition by 6xHxAxRxDxYx9. The first part, with the organ keys, disregard that as it does not apply to the story or her sadistic humming at all ;) Enjoy. The composer is really talented. Look up, also, Kingdom Hearts AMV Haunting Piano Melody by abstrackT7 and Horror Piano Theme by rajat555. Any of these three songs can be applied to "Victoria's Song". I'm leaving it up to you guys^^ Please tell me which of the three you prefer and I might make a side video for Victoria after I get the trailer for Blue Perfection up and running.

**Disclaimer: **I don't even own the books; that should be self-explanatory enough.

**A/N: I know that my updates have been **_**extremely**_** spread out date wise, and I'm sorry for not updating in a **_**long **_**time. I had thought that everything in my life was sorting itself out and that I'd have more time to work on fanfiction but I was **_**completely **_**wrong. I'm still working on balancing my busy school, soon to be work & volunteer work, as well as social schedule (which this last one is practically nonexistent due to the other two). My fiancé and I recently split due to the distance problem and my family/at home problems still have not subsided—in fact they've gotten worse. I apologize for making everyone wait for updates but fanfiction is—at the moment—the very last of my priorities. Sorry if that sounds harsh, but it's the truth and you guys deserve the truth. **

**My next update will by Sunday January 6****th****—so next weekend—without a doubt since I have half the chapter already completed. **

**Warning: Slight sexual themes but none of the citrus. **_**Strong**_** use of language. Graphic torture. **

_The screams are resonating_

_They're burning at my eyes_

_They cannot hope to wonder_

_The thoughts that I surmise_

—_Megan _

**Chapter Four**

The sweet, euphoric smell that practically saturated vampires was enough to send a girl into an orgasm on the spot. However, after I had realized what the Cullens truly were, the out of this world glamour that they held seemed to evaporate. Yes, they were still inhumanly beautiful with the grace that would make ballerinas cry, but the pull my senses felt towards them dimmed and the sweet scent of their skin had intensified.

Despite the fact that I hadn't lived with him long, Charlie's profession taught me many things—one of them being what a dead body smells like: fucking honeysuckles. Times infinity. It was hard not to know when the smell soaked his clothes. So waking up to a homicidal vampire with that repulsive stench filling my nose was the last fucking thing that I wanted right now. But, of course, life was a bitch, and a thorough one at that.

"Wake up, pet…" The soft coo wrapped around my ears, teasing along my senses as it roused me from the thick blanket of unconsciousness. A frigid ache filled my muscles as my mind cleared, the pain thrusting me into the world of the awake. Fear tinged me, gripping me so raw and sudden that it choked the air from my lungs, making it hard to keep under wraps the fight or flight response that was screaming through every cell of my body. If I adhered to either of those, though, I'd be fucked—even more so than I already was.

"I know you're awake. I can hear your delectable heartbeat. Its thundering has me so feverish to taste my prey, Bella. The fear in your veins just makes your blood taste…_sweeter_."

I attempted to keep my body still, purposely working on slowing down my breathing so that I could at least get a grasp on where the hell I was. The air smelled clean, and humidity had already soaked my clothes, making them cling to my body. A bead of sweat trailed the curve of my neck, providing sweet, cool relief. There was a rumble in the distance, and I felt my brows try to furrow—and fail with some effort—in confusion as I tried to discern what it was.

"Darling, darling, darling Bella…" Her voice was like chimes, echoing all around me. "If you don't open those pathetic eyes I'll just relish in the taste of…"

Her mouth trailed over my pulse point, her nose briefly brushing my neck, pushing a throaty purr of approval out of her throat. "No one can hear you scream here," she promised, bated anticipation in her every breath, and I could feel her body shivering against mine with excitement.

My eyes slowly slid open, reluctant to find her grinning scarlet ones. Fire consumed my sight, tickling my face as it framed alabaster skin.

"Good girl," she purred, her dark lashes brushing against her skin lightly as she blinked lazily in an unneeded motion. Running her fingers down my chest, stained blossom colored material parted easily before her nails, revealing milky skin. Goosebumps pimpled, making me aware of just how cold it was.

"Rape, Victoria? I didn't peg you as the type." Despite my best effort to remain calm, panic slithered into my voice, wrapping around it in a vise grip as the words released to the air.

It was hard to make her face out in the dim lighting, causing me to strain my eyes to the point that it hurt. I wanted to see her, I _wanted_ to see the face of the bitch that had irrevocably fucked my life sideways before flipping it completely upside down once again. Her nostrils flared slightly as she smelled the emotion saturate my scent and that catlike smile curved upwards in satisfaction. Orange curls brushed against the bare skin of my chest, fire laid across pearl.

"Do you know long much I've waited for this moment," she breathed, ignoring my question completely as she revealed her teeth. The dim lighting gleamed around the surprisingly sharp edges, causing my skin to suddenly feel as if it were shrinking away from her…or trying to, at least.

"I…I've waited for you, too." Her eyes narrowed at my words, and her fingers danced along the heated span of my skin, nails cutting as she went, causing deep red to weep forth and spider web along my stomach.

My chest rose and fell tumultuously with my pain laced breathing, the sudden urge to just beg her to get it over with sliding briefly over my tongue before I swallowed it. I was _not_ going to be fucking pathetic, even if I was going to die. I wouldn't give her the damn satisfaction. After all, that's what she wants. What she's been waiting for. To have me here in front of her, the very thread of my life twirled around her fingertips as I screamed, begged, and cried. I wouldn't—_couldn't_—give her that satisfaction. I wouldn't let the music of my screams soothe her heart; I wouldn't let her have that fucking closure. I wanted this moment to fucking haunt her for the rest of her miserable eternity—the knowledge that after all she's done, she still can't get a single scream to show for her revenge.

"I knew that you'd come for me one day to avenge him and James. After all," my eyes met her darkening ones. "You did fail the last time you tried."

I flinched unintentionally as a harsh growl ripped through her lips, reverberating with an encompassing intensity that magnified the sound. It swallowed me whole for a moment before the echo drifted off, and her voice sliced through the air, all pretenses of bubblegum and sugar siphoned from her tone.

"How dare you say his name," she hissed lowly, her nails digging into the flesh of my skin and dragging, as she bared her poisonously coated teeth. Venom once again pooled as black eyes flashed with that unbridled insanity. "Do you know how easily I could rip your tongue out…" Her voice was but a whisper as she drew frigid designs on my lips with a slender, pale finger. Copper slipped to my tongue. "My beloved James used to collect the tongues of his hunting conquests. When he had found me, I was still a fledgling on the run from the Volturi after they killed my sister and coven. At first, I tried to run from him but no matter where I went, he found me. He said that I was 'the best game ever' with my gift." Dark red glimmered, lost in a scene that I couldn't see, and it made me feel oddly disconnected from my own body. "He'd bring me the tongues of humans and vampires alike and tell me to pluck off each individual taste bud to help teach me how to manage my strength. In the old days, when no one would recognize the material, he used to make me gifts from them."

_That's disgusting, _I allowed myself to think as I fought to keep the utter revulsion off my face.

Almost as if responding to my thoughts she lunged her face closer to mine, snapping, "It was _beautiful. He_ was beautiful. He was my _everything_. And you…_A pathetic human child_…you took him away from me!" Venom, freeing from her mouth in her anger, flew in my face.

Scarlet eyes, glazed over with nostalgia—lost in the past, stared blankly at me—her lips blurring as she lost herself and spoke at a speed that I was unable to hear.

What did she expect me to do? Coo and go all fucking mushy eyed? Was she fucking _nuts_? Why the hell would I even remotely give a shit? She's already taken so much from me. My freedom, my life, any real chance I had to connect with someone outside of that mental prison, the precious veil of obliviousness that I once held…_Adam._

His name caused a sudden jolt of pain to rock through me, my stomach twisting into an inconceivable knot as my body felt like it was suddenly doused with cold water. Bile was rising in my throat again as I thought of the obtrusion nestling within the acids of my stomach. My fingers clenched and unclenched rapidly and I thought briefly about whether or not I could stick my hand down far enough to get it out. If I would ever be able to get it out or would that piece of him lie within me for the rest of my life—however short it would be.

"But you don't deserve anything that he did!" Victoria hissed, the statement bursting from her and stealing my thoughts from me as she reclaimed the track of her own. Hatred flickered, deeply set in her eyes as she cast her gaze back to mine. Quicker than I could comprehend pain erupted in my scalp, burning in my neck, as she fisted her pale fingers within my hair, harshly yanking my head back. Freezing lips caressed the middle of my throat, numbing the skin. "What makes you think that you deserve something so painless—deserve mercy? I could give you a quick death…" Teeth pressed harder into the hollow of my throat. Frigid digits inched closer to my pupils, so close that I could see how clean her nails were despite her nomadic lifestyle. My eyes snapped close in response and her fingertips met my eyelids instead, pressing against them lightly. "Tell me…do you like your eyes, Bella?" Ice ghosted across the lashes, freezing tongue tasting the skin of my throat.

My mouth went dry; my tongue turned to dust, collapsing where it was. Raging in my chest, trying to escape, was my heart—thrumming strongly as blood rushed in my ears, roaring as loud as rapids. I tried to swallow, failing miserably; I tried to muster up the bravado that I had before but all that was left of it was ashes within myself. "Yes…" I answered, choked, after the brief silence meant that it wasn't a rhetorical question.

"I could easily pluck them from your sockets. I have always been curious about whether the blood vessels within them would be edible." Fingers chilled, tongue pressed. My pulse thrummed, a hummingbird trapped beneath my rib cage and wrist. I could feel her tongue follow the plump lining of her lips, as she licked them, against my neck. "There's always a time to try something new. But I've been waiting so long for this…"

"Mate for mate." My eyes opened, a weight settling in my chest as I heard her voice say the same thing she had when Denis died. She was going to tear the mate of her mate's murderer out of this world. And, I was Edward's mate. Teeth gnashed on each word, gleaming and perfectly straight as she bared them, a snarl caught in her throat.

"I'm going to be honest with you, Bella Swan. An eye for an eye, mate for mate, scream for scream, blood for blood, sinew for sinew. Say it however you wish, but know," scarlet eyes burned brighter, "that every second the fire touched his skin, while he tried to get away, everything that those..." she searched for a word, angrily spitting it out, "unnatural _heathens_ did to him—all of it, will be the lightest brush of a feather against your skin."

Ice chilled me at her words. Somewhere inside of me, I had known that her humanity was gone and that any piece of mercy she had in her body was especially not reserved for me.

"Torture…" The word escaped me at a decibel that I couldn't even hear myself, but I felt it wisp from my lips. I swallowed, the motion refusing to cooperate, too clogged with fear, with bile. I felt like throwing up right where I was. Her past passionately heated promises of a drawn out death were not what she was implying any longer. _This was…_ "You're going to torture me." My voice was hoarse, rough. _This wasn't the animalistic side of vampiric nature. This was…_

Insane. Sadistic. _Evil._

I must have spoken the last word out loud because pain erupted in a blinding burst of heat, blood flowing out freely as a the bladed object that had suddenly appeared was slammed so hard into the side of my hip that it connected with the bone, scratching into it.

"_Fuck!" _I bit my tongue harshly, copper swirling in my mouth as I tried to stop the expletive—my pain—from reaching her ears. Words garbled, a loud but suppressed scream escaped me. My fingers clenched in their pain as my chest heaved with my heavy panting—breathing rushed and deep—and I inched them closer to the wound._ Motherfucking—_

Warm, dark substance swarmed my hand as I wrapped it around the hilt in an attempt to pull it out—rushed gasps hissing from me. Ice trudged through my veins, barely overshadowing the pain. It was wedged in the bone. My stomach lurched.

"What would you do, if you had _everything_ taken from you," she hissed. Scarlet eyes—blackening slowly by the second—narrowed, glaring down at me with unbridled fervor. Her bubblegum lips were set in a thin, angered line. "I'm not evil; no," Eyes flashing she flung her hand to my face, grasping my chin tightly—nails digging into flesh. Wide brown eyes—filled to the brim with pain—reflected back to me within the depths of hers. "I'm vengeance." Placing her fingers back on the hilt of the knife, briefly cover mine, eyes narrowed.

Pulling it out was worse than it was on the way in; I could feel it ripping and tearing everything in its path on its way up. My nails carved into my palm, biting into them so hard that it added to the blood spilt. A hiss escaped my lips as the knife slid up my hand as she yanked, and I quickly brought it to my chest, eyes blazing as I turned my gaze on her. Blood trickled from my hand, down my chest, and I could feel its warmth as it pooled within my belly button. I gritted my teeth as my hip throbbed prominently.

Anything I had to say caught in my throat as I saw the dim light gleam on the red stained _dagger,_ not knife; its blade was jagged and sharp. Pleas came and died on my tongue once again; I knew they wouldn't sway her. She had been planning this for a long time and nothing would deter her from what she had set in her mind.

Her feline body shivering with rapture at my pain, she brought the dagger to her lips, her tongue creeping out to run up the side. Sparks flew out from the metal—as her pale tongue crept upward in a lick—and singed my skin, orange and red burning the soft flesh of my breasts.

I wanted to close my eyes, to block everything out and retreat to some undiscovered part of my subconscious where I couldn't feel a thing, but I was too awake and too aware. Trying to take my mind off the pain, my eyes flitted everywhere, finding nothing but…

_Rock…?_

I began to clench my hand into a fist before a jolt of pain stopped me. Bringing it closer to my face I could make out the viscous liquid streaming slowly from the line stretching across my entire palm. My eyes watching it as it slowly fell down the skin like water.

The roaring from when I first woke up…

A weight settled in my chest, my eyes briefly slipping close as realization hit me.

"We're in a cave…" behind a waterfall.

"Where no one can hear you scream," The vampiress whispered, relishing in her words as she ran a slender, feminine finger along the lining of the dagger—eliciting more sparks to illuminate her face, bathing it in a quick orange light that shimmered across her skin, shining along her gleaming teeth.

"No one will find you," she murmured as she pressed the blade back to my skin, dipping it into the pathway of her desired "beautiful" patterns. My fingers and toes clenched and I forced the whimper to stay in my throat, shoving my bloodied hand into my mouth, balling it up into a fist as I bit down on it to smother the escaping outcry. The blade skirted along snowy planes before it cut, making swift work of my pants.

A growing melody—bouncing around in a lilting echo in the cave—made goosebumps rise on my overheating body, briefly taking my mind off of the stinging pain and the warmth of the viscous liquid as it gathered around, smothering my pale skin.

"Do you like it? James did," she murmured lowly as she continued to make patterns on my skin. "My mother hummed this over my body when she thought I was dead, before I woke up and slaughtered her. It seems fitting that I sing this to you. You thought that death would be near and," her voice darkened, whatever past thought she had vanishing as a growl built up in her throat, "it's not even over the next winter; you'll be begging for it, wishing you were never born."

_Winter? Just how long was she planning to keep me alive? _My heart thundered as panic took over my body, tensing my muscles—causing me to lurch forward into my hand to smother a cry as the muscles around my hip screamed at the movement.

"Oh don't worry," Victoria cooed, her fingers gripping my chin harshly as she turned my face from side to side in an admiring tilt. "I won't harm your precious face. You'll still be beautiful, up until the very last moment where I let the roaches pick at your skull."

Quicker than I could realize the dagger was making its work of my thighs—my eyes clenched tightly in an attempt to keep the tears from streaming down my cheeks and away from her greedy eyes—biting into the softness. The blade felt cold as it pressed against the heated flesh of my genitalia, its aim, for the moment, my sensitive inner thighs. My muscles strained tightly—making my hip throb in agony—as I tried to keep them from flailing in pain as the first cut made its presence known in a well of blood.

The hoarse scream of "_No_" died at my lips as I refused to let her reduce me to begging or screaming for her in a pathetic display of pleading. _Never_. My voice was the last thing that I had control over now, and I wanted to keep it that way.

My skin froze as ice swam over my thighs, lapping up the nectar like a cat would milk. "Rapture," she panted, moaning as the liquid hit her tongue. "I don't know how your beloved _Edward_," she spat his name like a curse, "stopped himself from tapping your veins and bleeding you like cattle."

Fucking Edward… Even in the midst of pain I still managed to muster irritation at his name. If he hadn't argued with Jasper then Victoria would've been hunted down after they killed James and I wouldn't be here. The blame sifted in my mind before ultimately resting on my shoulders, where it belonged. If I had stayed away from him, like he warned me to then…

Her sounds of pleasure magnified, and I struggled not to watch those red curls, dripping with my blood, as they moved with her head. Fingers raked down my legs, leaving blood in their wake as she moaned. "You taste so much better than that boy toy of yours did."

Adam; just his name caused my eyes to slide closed, my body shuddering slightly as I tried to keep all the sobs caged inside me.

His smile, green eyes twinkling as he threw his head back in laughter, flickered before the darkness behind my eyelids.

"_Missing something, sweetheart?" His mischievous smile illuminated his face as he twirled the pills I had hidden in between his fingers. A heated glare made its way on to my face and I lunged my arm towards his only to have him snap his fist closed, pulling it out of my reach. "Ah ah ah." Casting a wink my way he reached into his mouth, retrieving his own from his cheek. "I won't tell if you won't…" _

"_Bella," I muttered—answering the question that he had been repeating nonstop before the nurse came—leaning back on my chair as I appraised him warily. "My name is Bella." _

Tears pooled, and it was more of a struggle to keep them from falling than it had been when she was carving me up like a pumpkin.

Regret flashed through me so suddenly, molten lava through my veins that made my ears ring. I suddenly felt such regret for pushing him away after I had caught sight of the vampire through the window. Though it wasn't the desperate yearning that I had for Edward or the dysfunctional need that I had harbored for Denis, I had loved Adam. It was an innocent—but reluctant—love full of a warmth that hadn't existed previously—it was the most pure emotion that I had ever felt towards someone. It wasn't powerful or breathtaking or consuming, but it was pure, wholesome, healthy.

And I had repaid him by bringing him into this supernatural drama. He suffered. He was _decapitated_. She tore the flesh from his bones, disgraced his body, just to write that bloody message to me. Hatred for Victoria and myself flew openly through me; the thought that maybe I deserved this at the forefront of my mind.

Her tongue smoothed over the heated skin of my lower lips as she licked up the blood there, abruptly bringing me out of my thoughts as my bottom half jerked away from her out of its own accord—instantly receiving the sharp pain of the knife cutting deeply into my thigh, easily slicing through layers of skin as if they were butter.

"You're lucky you missed an artery, pet," she hissed, eyes darkening as she took in the pool of blood suddenly collecting on the dirty floor of the cave. An animalistic sound rumbled from her chest, mixing in with the distant roar of the unseen waterfall.

Teeth bared, she appeared to be fighting against herself internally—conflict flitting rapidly across her heart stopping face—and I found myself hoping that maybe she would give in to the bloodlust and lose control. That would end her sadistic game before she had the chance to begin and would grace me with the sweet relief that death would bring with its presence. Liberation, I could almost taste it on my tongue—it was bitter and all too fleeting, almost as if it had never existed in the first place.

Muscles barely quivering, a dry smile made its way onto her face as she slowly straightened herself out, coming to her full height above me. She was wearing a dark T-shirt promoting an ironic peace on earth mantra that swirled out across the span of her chest. The dried patches of dark brown and the way that it hung too loosely on her curvaceous figure told me that it had belonged to her last meals. Leaves were scattered throughout her flame colored hair, looking for all that they were worth that they belonged there on her cat like figure. Though I was positive that her hair had been drenched in my blood when she had moved, it was indistinguishable from the color in the lighting.

"_I_ won't be losing control, Bella. Flesh for flesh." The reminder of her vendetta hung in the air briefly. Her pale tongue caressed the curve of her full lips, ruby eyes glittering in the low lighting. "I did, however, get you a gift to help soothe your heart." My heart stammered, and by the delighted, slow grin arching up her lips she heard its frightened misstep.

"Oh, don't worry, sweetheart," she told me, her voice slipping into that sweet bubblegum tone that reeked of innocence while the rest of her looked like the cat that just ate the canary. She leaned down to me once more, nails slowly and lightly scratching under my chin like a domesticated animal—my veins popped out despite myself, thundering deliciously. "Your stay here is just beginning to get fun, I promise."

Slowly her form melted backwards into the shadows of the deeper part of the cave. "I hate you, from the very deepest part of my being to the flames that tickle my throat, I _despise_ you."

"But…Even though I hate you, I have a strong addiction to your scent. The tiniest amount of James' venom still flows through your veins, recycling with the rest of your filthy blood. And if I close my eyes and really focus…" Her breath hitched, the sound so loud that it echoed slightly within the cave. She emerged back from the dark, something enclosed in her fist—her free hand clutching the fabric over her heart so tightly that I thought that her nails were freely making their way to her ribcage. The pearls of her lids were spread out over her large eyes, shielding the scarlet from view and emphasizing the pale lavender beneath. "I can smell him, and concentrating on that specific aspect of your scent makes it feel like he's still here. I hate you, but I love your smell." She skimmed her nose up the column of my throat. "So delicious…So…."

"—I must have more," she hissed darkly, the slightly insane edge creeping into her throaty voice again. My scalp screamed in pain as she roughly yanked me up, my skin dragging through the puddle of my blood that had formed. My stomach lurched, as my eyes swept over the scarlet largely staining the stone—my mind unable to connect that it was _my_ scarlet, _my blood_ that was now painting the floor a lovely shade of red.

The rattling of the objects caught my ears as she dragged me towards her goal, instilling a sudden panic in me that had my muscles twitching to run and scream myself hoarse until someone,_ anyone_ came to help me. Lifting me up so fast that my head spun, she quickly had my arms in her grip, jerking them apart before trapping them inside something with a loud clang.

The horror of the situation, kept at bay by shock or whatever protective emotion that had been saving me, flooded my senses just then. It had become real when Victoria had said that she was going to torture me, but this. This put it all into perspective.

"I could just leave you here to rot. But that wouldn't be any fun, now would it?" A loud grunt of pain escaped my lips as she let me go with a rough hiss, the pain suddenly straining my shoulders and arms. I panted deeply, breathing through my nose as I tried to convince my body to get used to the position so it would hurt less but it was a lost cause. Pain wracked my wrists with the movement, blood already welling up as the inside of the cuffs.

"Sandpaper. Moving would be idiotic," she advised, my face suddenly becoming buried in her scarlet locks briefly as she whooshed downwards and clamped the cuffs of the chains already stuck in the floor around my ankles tightly. The inside of the cuffs scratched at the blood coated skin of my ankles, already beginning to rub them raw thanks to the swaying.

My body was trapped in the middle of the cave, chained up in an exposed loose X shape. My back tingled, fear surfing down my spine as my breathing turned slightly on the hyperventilation side. I couldn't see behind me, I realized, panic choking my throat. Vulnerable. I wouldn't be able see anything that she could sneak up on me with. _I couldn't see behind me. _

"Do you have nothing to say?" she baited, the disappointment briefly flashing across her features. The dagger that she still held in her hand, dripping my own blood to floor, stayed unused for the moment and I couldn't help the relief that gripped my heart painfully.

What else could I say? I was drained—emotionally, physically. My thighs burned, my hip throbbed insistently, and my head was already feeling lighter than the air around it. Would my words even fucking matter anymore? It didn't matter if they got to her or not; eventually, I would be nothing more than a bone pile in her closet that she rarely thinks about—insignificant.

"I must say that I am disappointed that you haven't tried to fight back once. You're not helping me to make this stay an enjoyable one."

Victoria's ear twitched slightly, before the frown marring her pretty face turned upwards sadistically. She did nothing to hide the bloodlust shining in her eyes. "Yes, you may come have your turn now."

Turn? _Like I was just some dingy toy that she could pass off_, I thought, blood trickling down my chin.

The purposeful steps of another person reached my ears, the way the soles of her or his feet caressed the stone beneath them melodically telling me that it was another vampire. With him came the scent of the waterfall. The frustrated desperation that had gripped me before came back with a vengeance once I realized that he was approaching from where I couldn't see him. The fact that I was naked seemed even more prominent in my mind—but the burning shame that I felt was overshadowed by my apprehension and wariness. He easily brushed past me, his skin feeling like it burned mine—which was wound up like a live wire—before he came to a stop near Victoria.

She laid a hand on the pale of his arm, curling around his body much like how she had with Denis. The ruby of her eyes gleamed within themselves, grinning despite the lack of a smile on her lips. "This will be your sole companion," she murmured, her fingers stroking the bare of his chest. Blood from his last meal stained his abdomen and chest, standing out like a beacon on his marble skin.

My eyes slowly moved up the side of his body, my own quaking with fear as I landed on his eyes. The same exact eyes that I had seen watching Adam and I through the window. Even from my position I could hear the rumble in his chest. Blood red eyes turned to me, the black infesting his irises like a disease as the smell of my life source reached his flaring nostrils. Dark brown hair framed his aristocrat face, making his flat black eyes seem even more demonic against his pale skin.

"Riley, my pet," Victoria purred as she rubbed herself down his side, marking him with her scent to remind him who he belonged to. Curling a pale arm around his neck briefly, lips at his ear, she said—loud enough for me to hear, "Enjoy your meal, darling," before they both suddenly disappeared from my sight and pain shattered throughout me, rattling my bones.

"You'll be nothing more than a sack of flesh when I'm through with you—mind destroyed and body fucked beyond recognition." His voice tore through the wave of nausea that I was fighting, making me see everything with excruciating clarity as adrenaline raced in my veins. A rich, melodic laugh escaped his lips, curling around the air and bidding my breathing to deepen. The chains were biting into my wrists, the sandpaper already rubbing them raw. "Who knows? If this thirst that we have isn't quenched by you, she might even end up letting you live and will use you as a pet to help destroy those pathetic Cullens. You must be gifted; why else would they keep a whore like you around if not for sex?"

Old paroxysm rushed through me before I squelched it, determined not to let him get into my head. I may have been a pet, but I had never—

"I want you to count, Bella."

My head swam, heart stuttering as I tried to come to grips with the sudden pain that splayed itself across my back but the sudden eruption of it again had my thoughts cutting short. Muscles screamed for me, stealing the sound from my voice as my mouth opened in a silent scream that still managed to leave my throat feeling raw.

"Count," he commanded once more, unnatural speed helping him move into my peripheral vision; leather was coiled around his arm, baring many smaller attachments. His eyes were dark and endless—bottomless pools of coal. "I won't mind going to pick up that little girl I saw in the room and asking her to play as well. She smelled—"

_Mikayla…_

Anger flitted through me as my breath exhaled from me in a whoosh, the word hissing from my teeth, starting him from his sentence. "One."

The pain ate into my back, stinging along my skin, almost bringing me to my knees.

"T-two," I spoke out past my clenched teeth.

"…Three…"

Warmth trickled down my back.

"Four."

_Thwack._ The sound echoed loudly within the cave, making my stomach lurch.

"Five…"

The sound of tearing flesh.

"Six."

My body jerked as the force hit me, the chains bringing me right back. Blood warmed my wrists, trapped between the rough surface and the chains.

"Seven."

The sound of it…

"Eight."

Memories I didn't want to remember surfaced. I wanted anything, _anything_ to keep my mind off of what was happening to me.

"Nine."

"_You're simply a human, who unfortunately was in the wrong place, at the wrong time, and indisputably running with the wrong crowd, I might add." _

"Ten."

"_But I want to move to Forks, Mom. It will give me and Charlie a chance to bond." A forced smile made its way on my face, all so that she could have a real one._

"Eleven." My muscles palpitated on their own, the object whipping into me hitting nerves. My nails bit into my palms and I kept my eyes squeezed closed so hard that it hurt, the tears trapped inside and away from satisfaction seeking eyes.

"Fourteen."

"_Hello," said a quiet, musical voice. The voice that changed everything for me. I could hear it ringing in my ears._

"He isn't going to save you," Riley whispered, making me realize that Edward's name must have slipped my lips for the first time in years.

"S-sixteen," I murmured, accidentally skipping a number.

All of a sudden a flurry of pain wracked my entire body, feeling like the whip had hit me multiple times—overshadowing every other hit previously. The loudly rattling chains protested as my body seized with the onslaught of the pain, it shuddering through me in soundless waves that had my throat burning with screams that I refused to let loose. As the last jerk ran through me everything in me went still.

My body hung, scarlet weaving in ribbons along my body as it dripped and streamed down, covering me in some sense of grotesque fashion. My head was swimming in a sea of dizziness.

"Did you not listen?" he hissed. "I said to not miscount, mortal."

_Drip._ The sound seemed amplified as the blood trailed down my body, providing an odd sense of warmth before it fell from my downward pointed toes.

_Drip._

"Imbecile."

_Drip._

_Drip._

He moved at a human pace, his feet scraping along the rock floor as he traveled.

"You're weak. Pathetic," he spat. I faintly heard him come closer, drifting on the edge of unconsciousness before I was roughly jerked back into reality as he wretched my chin up, squeezing it painfully between his fingers.

"But you look so gorgeous bathed in your own blood. Only the music of your screams would have made it sweeter," he murmured, dark eyes burning into mine before his lips crashed down. They descended, forcing mine open with a wanting that made my body crawl with disgust. His tongue was a slug, banging insistently against mine with no regard.

His fingers trailed along my breast before dirt encrusted nails bit into the soft flesh of one ripe globe, raking down hard enough to leave a vibrant trail of blood. With an audible smack he released me from my prison, a line of saliva and blood still connecting our mouths.

A strangled sound of anger wretched from my lips as I tried to move, my muscles protesting as the chains bit into them.

"Fucking bastard," I spat, my voice manifesting into hatred as I worked it up in my mouth, only to have the process halted as I was delivered a backhand. _Something about my spit must be offensive since I can never hack one,_ I thought wryly, as I turned my face back to him, feeling the scarlet tinged fluid dribble down my chin.

I wanted to feel fear. Wanted to feel anything but what I was. _Anger_. It filled my every pore. Anger was dangerous; it would make me do something stupid and stupidity around a vampire didn't stand a chance.

"You know, I was an artist before I was changed," the bastard suddenly said, making me whirl my eyes to his, hatred blazing in them. Like I gave a shit about anything to do with him, and I bet he fucking knew that too. He licked his lips, eyes closing briefly as he savored my taste. His hand suddenly reached out, grabbing a breast in his hand roughly, making me hiss in pain. _Fucking as—_

"Your body…" He smoothed the pad of a frigid thumb over the peak of my nipple, making a sudden twitch of fear sit in me. "Is so perfect." Brown curls dipped into his dark red eyes as his gaze flickered back to me.

"Do you think I care?" I asked, my words slightly garbled as the metallic taste of blood filled my mouth. "Just stop fucking touching me with your grubby little fucking hands! Go fuck Victoria, bastard. I'm not into necrophilia so leave me alone, you sick fuck," I seethed, trying to bat down the senseless urge to struggle. It wouldn't even matter if I could get free. Angered tears were beginning to prick my eyes, and every cell in my body was standing alert, dread tingling through them.

"Your anger…Your desperation...It's so heartbreakingly beautiful, Bella." His eyes darkened as they trailed over my form. "So beautiful... I want to devour it." His tongue swiped across the perfect rose of his lips as he caressed my skin again. "All of it."

A maniacal laugh tore its way out of my lips as I turned my head to the side, arching my neck painfully so that the vein stood out. "Do it, dammit! You think I fucking care?!"

Chillingly hard skin trailed itself along the tendon in my neck before lips caressed it. Teeth pressed against the hollow of my throat, the wet embrace of his mouth making my body jolt with a sudden douse of fear. Red eyes penetrated my own, "You will break soon, and when you do…you'll submit to me before Victoria kills you."

Burning fear ran down my spine, nestling in my back, as my eyes flitted down to meet his, to gauge the sincerity in him. "Su-submit?" Anxiety nestled in my voice, any pretense of bravery that I had falling to my feet along with my stomach. The blood that had rushed to my face in my anger drained, leaving me—and just me—staring at him. My eyes slid close, fright flashing through me as he leaned closer, his fingers skirting down my stomach, skating an icy pathway.

Icy lips brushed my ear lobe, teeth catching it. "I want to fuck you so hard that you won't think of anything other than how you can please me. I want to hear your voice call me Master as you crawl forward to come suck my dick. You _will_ want me before Victoria is through with you, Bella. I'll make sure of it. I've been watching you for too long to take no for an answer." Lust glimmered deeply in his dark eyes.

Rape…

I was going to be raped…

A finger slid across my eyes, catching the tear before it fell. "Don't cry. Beauty shouldn't shed tears" he murmured. "Victoria said you're mine. I promise. I'll be gentle, and I won't hurt you."

Gazed into his eyes with disguised fright, trying to search them to realize if he was being truthful but it was lost on my as my stomach sunk heavily at the sudden motion on my neck. His lips caressed the skin there—a frost bitten kiss that seemed to spread the cold throughout my body. They moved, planting well placed kisses that trailed down from my chest to my arm. With a loud lurch the cuffs that held my arm captive were removed, skin slithering off with the grains, as the sliver of control that he had was ripped away once his lips accidentally brushed against my pulse point.

Before my mind even had time to react to the sudden danger, control of my limbs was slowly being relinquished from my brain, and the heat licked at my flesh from within. My muscles strained, convulsing on their own as my body began twisting into painful positions, as if somehow the pain it caused would override the blinding demand of the venom as it slithered within me. A choked gasp seemed to be sucked from my lips as it dominated the air, my fingers clenching and unclenching rapidly. The loud thump echoed as my body slipped through his fingers and threw itself on the floor of the cave.

_He's burning me—the fire!_

Teeth gnashed, wounds throbbed. All sense of logic flew out the window as my fingers clutched the bite on my arm—digging into it as if that would help.

"_What's it like?" I asked quietly, curiosity winning over the silence that I had been exuding. _

_Almost instantly a cloud washed over his handsome face, darkening his features before it was lifted and he brought me closer, swiftly planting a lingering kiss in my hair. "Let's not talk about that, love."_

"_It's like acid dousing every muscle, disintegrated every single atom before beginning the painstaking process of rebuilding everything from the ashes," Jasper murmured, his carried voice causing us to whip our heads to him—Edward's in anger and mine in that burning curiosity. Honey eyes met my own, glittering like an animal's in the back of the dark car. "It's not something that you can comprehend until you feel it."_

The long forgotten memory flashed through my mind, bringing back the memory of the sear of James' venom—adding to the fire that was raging through my veins, consuming all in its path.

_The fire!_

I struggled to retain sense of my mind but the burn demanded all my attention.

"_Edward, you have to suck the venom out." _

Trying to control the prominent urge to flail and writhe, I brought my arm to my lips, digging my teeth into my flesh as I sucked out the sickly sweet venom, the pained cry that escaped my lips garbled by the blood that ran down my chin and pooled softly on the stained stone.

The ironic flavor of too sweet candy engulfed my mouth, thickly intertwined with the metallic taste of blood. It had me retching inside my mouth but I had no choice but to push on. There was no way in fucking hell that I was becoming a vampire, especially not tainted by that fucker's poison or by any-fucking-one. Venom came out of the wound so quickly that it left me with no choice but to swallow it miserably, making my stomach lurch as my blood ran down my throat in a steady stream.

"Shit," Riley swore—I could barely make him out through my contortions and the tears that were searing my eyes and blurring my vision. The demanding burn that had been coursing through my veins began to rescind painstakingly slow, seeming to suck my consciousness with it; but I kept swallowing, forcing the thick liquid back into my throat and down into my stomach.

I couldn't feel my hip or thighs anymore nor the fresh wounds on my back. Their pain had been lost in the burn and even though the fire was slowly lifting, the pain never did return. It had been drowned out. I had been drowned out; any awareness siphoning out with my blood. My eyes and tongue felt heavy, the copper and venom suddenly seeming tasteless despite the fact that my mouth and teeth were still overlapping Riley's bite.

My head, having once felt so light, now easily latched onto the wind of unconsciousness that had been threatening to overtake me. There was no pain. No worries. Just blank.

Nothingness.

Darkness.

It consumed me.

But, of course, it didn't last.

When my conscious mind did flicker back on, my eyes fluttered open at the best possible moment.

"Why do I smell traces of your venom in her veins," Victoria hissed, her eyes darkening as they narrowed on Riley, her feline form stalking up to him in a movement that was too quick for my human eyes to follow. Her hand found itself closed around his throat. Her satisfaction at the movement became mine, and I reveled in his pain.

Almost instantly he had their positions reversed, pushing her against the wall as he purred, wheedling seductively, "But you could do so much more with her if she was a vampire. You could burn her body and bury her head underground so that all she would know would be an eternity of maggots and worms."

Even in as much pain as I was, bordering on the edge of consciousness thanks to blood loss and already half gone mentally, I still managed to smile at her. "Can't find him in me anymore, can you? Looks like your solace is gone, bitch."

Seeing the pain that had suddenly shattered his—so I've gathered—sire's face, Riley instantly turned his head to mine. He placed a strong hand on Victoria's shoulder in a show of comfort before a twisted smirk was cast in my direction; fear settled in me as his eyes moved over my body languidly slow with sick appreciation.

"But we could find your pretty boy for you, Bella." The smile instantly drained from my face along with the blood. A hollow pain gripped my chest, its fingers tightening around my heart as grief took a hold of me. I tried to muster some wisp of anger but the wave of nausea and guilt stifled it. "Sure, he's in pieces but that doesn't necessarily matter. You could still fuck what's left." My stomach rolled. "Think of it as one last joy ride, beautiful," Riley murmured, casting a drawn out wink at me.

The vampiress' body shuddered with barely restrained will, her nipples straining against the taut fabric of her shirt. "Oh, Riley," Victoria's moan echoed in the air before the sound of thunder echoed throughout the cave as the two marble bodies crashed together, clothes tearing easily under their hands.

Numbly, my body still jerking slightly from the effects of Riley's venom, I shivered and tried to ignore the loud roars of pleasure that were surrounding me. Tried to ignore how rather than focusing on Victoria, Riley's eyes were pinned dead on my naked form as he positioned himself at her entrance before driving himself into her. His eyes, blackened, were swirling with passion and made vomit rise in my throat. Swallowing it back, I tried to use my arms to lift me up so that I could move myself into a different position, but they wobbled before collapsing underneath me. The stone hit my chin roughly but any pain was lost on me.

Water dripped down from the ceiling, chilling and cooling as it had a hand in pushing back the receding heat that had warmed me for only the briefest moment. My eyes fluttered closed, eliminating the dim lighting that strained them. A weight settled in my chest but I couldn't bring myself to care. It was acceptance; acceptance of the inevitability of losing myself and who I was completely—whether by insanity or by death.

My muscles shuddered, twitching with every tiny movement that I made as they continued contracting.

I had condemned my own fate years ago the moment that my mind decided that the ancient instinctual warning that the vampires carried would do nothing to deter me from getting close to them.

I shuddered with anger this time, clenching my eyes together fiercely as I fully allowed me to admit something to myself. It resonated within me, the acceptance weighing me down despite the fact that I was so lightheaded that I could pass out. I repeated it mentally, angered and frustrated tears pricking at my eyes though they would do me no good.

I was going to die here, and I could do nothing to stop it.

_****IMPORTANT**: Anything underlined in any of my Author's Notes are the important ones that you should definitely read. All the rest, if you're not interested, then skip over. But please read anything underlined. Thank you.**_

_**Random offer: If you find yourself having a good idea for a Peter/Bella fic that you want to read but you don't feel like writing it and no one has posted it yet, then leave a review with the basic plot and/or prompt and I'll try to work with it and have them all out around February. Whether I'll continue them as stories or have them as a one-shot is my determination; however, you will get credit for the prompt. Thank you! Now onto the actual Authors Note:**_

**I hoped that was horrible and lived up to everyone's expectations. I added on a handful of more pages than normal to say sorry for the lack of updating. More torture coming up next chapter, and it gets worse. If you can't stand this and won't be able to stomach the next chapter ****PM me on the update date and I'll tell you anything important that you missed****.**

**Also, for anyone who wants to know. The weapon that Bella was describing Riley as using on her is called The Cat 'O' Nine Tails—and it's a very painful whipping device. **

**Now that we're getting into the regular flow of things (as in that I am almost finally done setting up the plot line and will be able to get into it soon), I will start ****giving out lengthy previews of the next chapter :) per review. ****I already have half of it done, so all of you, my wonderful readers—and hopefully reviewers—can expect an update in the range of this Thursday to the following Sunday. **

**For those who have friended me on facebook for the updates: You **_**must**_** tell me that you're from fanfiction in a message because I won't log on every single day to post updates on the writing process, quotes, snippets, videos, and photos if no one is going to look at them. So friend me (Eryn Silvenia) for all that I mentioned previously. Also, for those who have asked and those who have wondered, I have not started on a Youtube trailer yet because I want Peter to at least appear first before constructing and uploading one. **

**Drop a review. If I get break 100—I know, that's a long way to go—by this Thursday then I'll post a One-shot the following update date to give the full chapter with the flashback containing Bella, Edward, and Jasper in the car. **

**Summary****: Jasper had always been the quiet one, the one that was always in the background whenever I was with Edward or never even there at all. So, when Alice had called me telling me that only I could stop Jasper from slipping in public, it was only natural that I'd rush right over. But bringing along a nosy vampire babysitter—a protective nosy vampire babysitter that just so happened to be my boyfriend—was proving to be difficult seeing as it only irritated the unpredictable blond further. **

**Well, I'm exhausted so…going to bed here. Have a good day/morning/night everyone^^**

**~Eryn "Ninja" Silvenia**


	5. Chapter 5

_**From: UPDATE (Guest)**_

UPDATE:I WRITE FANFICTION so I MUST NEVER UDATE.

Oh shit bitch, that's actually true about you. I have waited since this  
chapter came out for the next one, and I had to wait a long time before for  
this one. So please, fucking update already!

Here is the update that you, Guest, wanted so badly. Now, this story is officially on hiatus.

I don't take the time to respond to reviews like this, however, this one honestly ruined my day as well as made me realize just how insensitive some people are.

Forget the fact, sir or madam, that my last best friend—considering that the other one died three years ago in a car accident—died recently in the past few months after committing suicide. I _apologize_ for not being able to keep my life together. Forget the fact that my fiance of close to three years had to move out of the country indefinitely, which led to the ending of our engagement. The time that I needed the people close to me, they were either dead or unreachable. Forget the fact that my life did fall apart, I'll admit that. So, it is only natural that I was spending my time trying to convince myself to carry on—as opposed to the alternative—any rather than writing fanfictions. After Leslioma—my best friend and the person who introduced me to fanfiction in the first place—died, I _apologize_ for the fact that fanfiction was the last thing that I wanted to look at, let alone write. I am _just_ now beginning to _read_ fanfiction again.

This is the reality of what is going on in my life. If that makes me a bitch, then so be it. But being insensitive, self-absorbed, asinine, and inconsiderate to those around you—even through the internet—is completely uncalled for and I applaud you for getting an update out of me. This story (even though I was considering picking back up the "pen" so to speak in a week or so) is on hiatus—until I deem so. The last thing that I need is to be berated for actually trying to get my life back together. Especially by someone who didn't even have the courage to send such a message through his/her real account so that I may respond.

I truly apologize to those who have done nothing but support me. In a sense, "one bad apple" really does ruin "the bunch". I will return to this story one day, however, it will not be as soon as it was going to be previously.

—Eryn "Ninja" Silvenia


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